**Updated on 20 Nov at bottom
Recently, a girlfriend whose child attends an ESF school in a different catchment area told me Rockstar’s name had come up with another mutual acquaintance. Hearing of the apparent encounter between Rockstar and a little girl on the playground, purportedly him having been blunt and hurt her feelings several weeks ago, I vow to ask him to say something nice to her – especially since she seemed to have been upset enough that this apparently made it to the other school and back many weeks later. And so when he got back from school…
Me: Hi darling, how was your day?
Rockstar: It was ok, it was good <shrugs>…
Me: Did you see (aforementioned little girl) on the playground today?
Me: Oh…. Well do you think you can do me a favor please?
Rockstar: Yeah, what?
Me: I think she might be a bit upset by stuff you said to her awhile ago <Rockstar gives me a puzzled frown>, d’you think next time you bump into her on the playground you could say something nice so she knows it’s not that you don’t like her?
Rockstar: <thinks for moment> I’ll try, but I’ve never seen her on the playground.
Me: Well, if you could just – wait. You’ve never seen her?
Rockstar: Nope. It’s very hard to see her, and I also want to find (his favorite friend.) And her class is far away. I know because I asked her what class she was in when we were going to the school bus(es).
Me: You’ve never seen her on the playground? You didn’t see her pick up an eraser off the floor on the playground?
Me: Did you see her pick a pencil eraser up off the floor in the playground?
<Rockstar shakes head disinterestedly>
Me: Anywhere? Ever?
Me: You didn’t tell her keeping the eraser was stealing? And then say she was lying after she said she would, but then didn’t try, to return it? (You can see why it hadn’t occurred to me Rockstar didn’t do it, him being Mr Anal And Everything Has To Be Black Or White)
Rockstar: <thoughtfully> The only thing I’ve said to her is “What class are you in?”
Me: Well… Anyway next time you see her can you say something nice?
Rockstar: <seriously> I could say “Good Morning”… But it’s very hard -
Me: To catch her on the playground – yes, you said….
Which is when I finally remember hearing sometime back that there is another boy in their year with the same name as Rockstar’s. Even their family names sound similar enough that sometime back when we were applying to primary school the two boys had also gotten mixed up briefly…
Me: Remember you told me you met Other Rockstar? What does he look like, does he look like you?
Rockstar: Oh, quite different. He looks nothing like me – he looks quite Korean.
I want to ask Boy, What You Think You Look Like Ah? Oh wait, I did. He said…….
Me: What “not Korean”.
Rockstar: Not Korean. I don’t look Korean.
Me: Uh… Do you think you look Asian?
Rockstar: Yeah. Just not Korean.
Me: What Korean/ Not Korean?? What’s the “Korean” look??
Rockstar: <patiently> Not like me. <later on, looks at my screen> Are you typing that? (He doesn’t think it’s interesting)
Sigh. At some point you just decide to stop talking. Anyway it would appear people sometimes mix Rockstar up with another boy at school…
ps: I finally got out of him that by “Korean” he means have “Asian eyes” with the single eyelids. Apparently he doesn’t think his eyes look like that…..
pps: Had Rockstar told the other girl off he would probably have responded to my asking with a What’s Wrong With That attitude… He accepts full punishments for misdemeanors (for now anyway) – for e.g. when he was supposed to finish an IXL math module before watching Lego videos on Youtube while I walked the dog and then didn’t finish the module, (I would later discover there was something he hadn’t understood after I left him with the laptop, and then he’d gotten bored), he gravely accepted that in future I wouldn’t ready the Youtube for him til after he had finished schoolwork (i.e. added inconvenience of waiting til I get back with dog), and that he would have to do an extra module because I was annoyed he hadn’t finished. In fact, he volunteered the extra module.
But it’s kinda hard to explain to the proverbial little girls with erasers so I’ll take “Good Morning” while trying to preempt any harsh judgements…
**UPDATE: Rockstar came home from school and told me he had done it. Told the girl off about the eraser. So it wasn’t Other Rockstar, it was my Rockstar. Who had forgotten (also not paid much attention when I tried to talk to him about it at first) til he’d gone back to school and seen her somewhere, and then realized on the playground he had encountered her once before the school holidays (yes quite a long time ago). AND he still thought the eraser thing was wrong, “She’s quite nice, except for that one time she was a little naughty…” So I did the whole “technically it’s wrong, but you could have helped her find a way to return it (lost & found box or something), instead of getting all puffed up and telling her off” speech I originally intended.