Rockstarism #293 – Monkeys

#293

Rockstar: Mum! Come! <indignant> Listen to what Little Miss just called me. 

Me: What now?

Rockstar: She called me a monkey.

Little Miss: Mmungg-key. Mmungg-key.

Rockstar: See? <hands folded> Naughty girl! Tsk! <extremely scandalized expression>

Me: <trying not to laugh> And who taught her the word? She was calling cats and goats monkeys and you and Daddy thought it was so funny. I don’t even have a single picture of a monkey in her books to show her and somehow you guys taught her “monkey”. It was only a matter of time, and anyway you look more like a monkey than a kitten does.

Little Miss: <happily> Mmungg-key! Mmungg-key! Mmungg-key! 

Rockstar: <indignantly> No! “Ko-ko”! Naughty girl!

Me: She could just be saying the word cos it’s the latest word she learned. Maybe she’s just saying the word over and over and you got in the way of her addressing something as a monkey. (To Miss) Who’s that?

Little Miss: <apparently trying very hard> Monkey.

Rockstar: NNNNOOO!

Little Miss: Nnnnnoo!

Me: No –

Little Miss: No

Me: No, I mean –

Little Miss: <happily, cos she’s got this one down perfectly> No!

Me: (Careful not to say any other word because Rockstar is about to have a fit at the inappropriateness of it all) <pointing at Rockstar> Ko-Ko. Ko-Ko. Who’s that?

<pause>

Little Miss: <carefully> Ko-Ko monkey.

That Thing About Books And Covers Part II

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ps: What d’you think Rockstar’s reaction to “Ko-ko Monkey” was?

Posted in aileensml | 3 Comments

Friday Lessons

1) Rough translation: “A Day At Work Doesn’t Look Like This. What About A Day At School?” France Television’s anti-bullying video.

… And an additional comment that while all bullying is sad, not all bullying is that obvious, especially in Hong Kong. Crackdowns on “obvious” bullying make bullies more subtle, not gone. I blame society’s ultra competitiveness that starts at a younger and younger age every generation… (But I have to say we have a few French quant friends, one of whom lives in an actual castle (I…know! HOW un-Hong Kong is that??) back home, and their math is just insane and I mean that as a compliment, and I really don’t know whether or not they were ultra competitive from very young… I charge there isn’t as much correlation to ultra-competitiveness and brilliance as we might have thought…)

2) In contrast: Teenager Brings Class To Tears By Just Saying A Few Words. Almost bullied out for a near-debilitating stammer, Musharaf Asghar overcomes it. Watch his classmates’ reactions towards the end. I put that here because it shows teenagers can (also) be kind, happy for their friend. Watching quite a few teenaged boys tear up was so sweet.

http://youtu.be/-shi5BL-Y2Q

(And how cute is the nick “Mushy”? But it’s also here because weaknesses can be turned into huge strengths. I love humans that way. Well not for everything, but at least that one. Sometimes almost as fun as investment products.)

3) Most schools could probably start a very good one… British Teacher Archives Confiscated Toys. Note conkers and sikh knife.

ConfiscatedItems1Final.jpg.CROP.original-original

4) To entertain Rockstar: Quirkology’s 10 Simple Party Stunts

5) To entertain everyone else: 19 kids probably dressed better than you. Here’s a couple I just had to say something about:

a) Matching dog  b) Matching bandana c) He's taking a selfie???

a) Matching dog
b) Matching bandana
c) He’s taking a selfie? To what, post on his Instagram or FB?!

Hipster cool

Hipster cool

Love the outfit but you know I had words with Rockstar recently about kicking walls when we're out and about (I'd forbidden him to kick people and he has been on a real taekwondo kicking practice spree) because his shoes were leaving marks on the walls...

Love the outfit but  I had words with Rockstar recently about kicking walls when we’re out (I’d forbidden him to kick people and he has been on a real taekwondo kicking practice spree) because his shoes were leaving marks…

Umm… I didn’t have many choices for the girl ones either because most had duck face or some pout or other, and I’m still in the prudish phase of believing I might be able to keep Little Miss from pout and duck face until I don’t know, 21? 😀 (fine, 13 at least?)

This doesn't count, right?

(And this doesn’t count, right?)

6) A-and Lesson Time In The Rockstar Household…

Little Miss’ this week was Not All Dogs Are JD. She is of course, completely unafraid of dogs (and probably cows and goats and sheep if she met the real ones because right now she’s giving me the animal magnets and declaring them dogs too) and this is n-ot exactly a good thing.

So this was her this morning, 5 minutes before she was bowled over by what was either a huge Irish Setter or Rhodesian Ridgeback or some other large breed puppy (i.e. behaves like a puppy complete with chewing at you because she’s teething but is really not the size of a puppy – this one was about two-thirds the size of 17kg JD) who swarmed up her shoulders trying to lick her face.

photo-1570

I think she got this when she fell over

I think she got this when she fell over

But no, I did not follow after the dog minder (who was an errant helper – the owners should know their new crazy jumpy-licky puppy was running loose where there is water and very fast cars not that far away), yelling repeatedly that the dog was “uncontrollable” and that we should “shoot it and kill it.” (True story ok, JD at 7 months herded a boy close to my height in Botanical Gardens Singapore during her night walk and the mum did that. It wasn’t even like she actually touched him, she just ran really fast around him like he was a sheep, but he screamed like a little girl which I guess is why his mum got mad.)

So I asked the helper wait, and when Little Miss had calmed down (maybe couple minutes) I had Big Crazy Licky Puppy brought back to meet Little Miss because I wanted Little Miss to understand the dog wasn’t trying to hurt her, but that dogs really don’t all behave like JD and she needs to not go right up to every dog she sees and feed them Gerber Stars. Little Miss stared at the fast-moving whip-like tail with a kind of horrified fascination BUT didn’t try to grab it. She did run her hand over the dog’s silky red coat (while we held Crazy Licky down a bit to keep her from jumping all over the Miss again) before going back to JD.

Lesson Learnt...

Sensory comparison of tails and coats

Little Miss was very happy to stay close to JD after… (I also think she was very happy JD doesn’t do Crazy Licky with tail like disembodied cicak’s.)

And what did Rockstar learn?

A lot.

A lot.

Seriously a lot. His long-awaited Year 2 Christmas Show was yesterday, that’s a whole other post, but Kings is away this weekend again so I probably won’t have time to blog a longer one til next week…

Good weekend, one and all.

Posted in The TGIF Posts | 1 Comment

Perchance, To Sleep

So Kings has been gone a lot (I know, tell you something you don’t know) and this latest marathon communal sleep arrangement meant I went without. See, I used to put Rockstar to bed by himself and then trot off to the baby (who’d been put down for her night time sleep earlier) for the night. Unfortunately the baby then grew into a toddler who decided to stick it out past Rockstar’s bedtime just for the fun of it. Yes my toddler goes to sleep later than my older boy does. Unless I succeed in getting them both down at the same time (not that often).

To Sleep, Perchance To Cute Hat

To Sleep, Perchance To Cute Hat

Also, Little Miss has made it her current little life’s goal to keep Rockstar from going to sleep at night. I leave the two alone to go to the bathroom and I return to find her watching his feet twitch as she tickles them while he sleeps. She is not to be left with her fusspot brother unless she is well and truly unconscious and you need to constantly check she still is, she is an incredibly light sleeper. And the moment she is conscious enough to move she plays Will He Wake Up If I Do This? (Tickles feet). And this? (Pokes him in side with finger). And this? (Flops unceremoniously on top of him in the name of a bear hug). And this? (Moves to sit on his head which is about when I dive at her coming out of the bathroom and scoop her away from him just in the nick of time.)

Fortunately once asleep Rockstar can sleep through a bomb going off, rarely waking except to go to the bathroom. But then Little Miss is bold and…. creative? Once I came back in from the bathroom to find her theatrically “reading” her big board book of shapes – with the book resting on her sleeping brother’s back.

Sometimes I glare at her for that ill-timed gabble just when he’s about to fall asleep and she will mock-seriously put her finger to her lips “Shh. Sh. How does one keep a straight face to that?

One needs his personal space but discovered he loves the warm and fuzzy of a hug – when he finally hugged his sister. The other is a social animal who on a good day “Hi!”s everyone she meets – the Park n Shop sushi counter aunties where we pick up Rockstar’s school lunch for the following day. Random helpers walking dogs we pass in the the stroller. Who knew, most Hong Kong taxi drivers actually say “Hi” and “Bye” back.

Which is just great because last week with the unsleep I haven’t been hi-ing many passersby myself.

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ps: Oh yeah, and she had her shot for her regular 18month too. Dare I hope she’s now developed Rockstar’s relatively high pain threshold? First time not even flinching at the shot, she used to really bawl her lungs out. 

Oh, and touch wood she has a clean bill of health too, though no one can do anything about the almost daily throwing up of one meal or other – it appears she just has really sensitive gag reflex.

BUT the biggest news was I managed to ask “The Nice Lady Doctor” as Rockstar refers to her about Rockstar’s height (whether he was abnormally short/small.) He’s not, after a brief discussion in which the phrases hormone shots and trip to the endocrinologist were mentioned (and thankfully dismissed). And so we all know what THAT means – that means I can bring Rockstar back for real and not blink when they take his height measurement and they go through the height charts. I asked Doctor Wong beforehand before we brought Rockstar back in case there was anything I didn’t want him to hear in quite “that” many blunt words. 

Posted in Babycare Bootcamp, Rockstar Shots | 2 Comments

Rockstarism #292 – Broccoli Is A Choking Hazard

#292

Rockstar wanders into the master bedroom one evening…

Rockstar: <conversationally> Mum. Lemme tell you something. (Our helper) gave Little Miss a green choking hazard.

I peer outside with raised eyebrows to find my helper snorting and indicating a bit of broccoli she plucked from his dinner plate for Little Miss. “He say cannot, but I just take.” (No surprises this would annoy Rockstar – since toddlerhood, if you wait a few extra seconds for him to decide it’s ok and then take it, you can mostly “borrow” anything. But do it without his consent and he never agrees.)

Me (to Rockstar): Why didn’t you just say “broccoli”?

Rockstar: Broccoli. Huh. <grins>

Me: You just wanted to say something, didn’t you.. And I bet you haven’t finished your dinner. Out. Go finish it.

Rockstar: Now I can’t go back out there.

Me: ?! Why?

Rockstar: (Our helper) thinks I tried to get her in trouble. I think I’ll just stay in here. (Starts practicing side kicks on his sandbag.)

We got Rockstar a sandbag for passing his yellow-green.

We got Rockstar a sandbag for passing his yellow-green with an A.

Me: That’s convenient. Planned all that, did you?

Rockstar: <thinks seriously for moment> …..Not really. I just wanted to complain about the broccoli. <brightens> But it worked out pretty well, didn’t it? 

Me: Out.

Rockstar grins but doesn’t really move.

Me: Byyeeee.

Little Miss (from outside, cheerfully): Byyeeee.

Me (to the Miss): No, not for you. Ko-ko’s coming to join you. You’d say “Hi.”

Little Miss (obligingly, in same tone): Hiiiiiiiii.

Rockstar ambles back out without another word.

Of course Little Miss had to try out the gloves (that came with the bag).

Of course Little Miss had to try out the gloves (that came with the bag).

ps: We drum it into Rockstar all the time not to “taekwondo” outside of his training classes – it’s something I feel very strongly about because I grew up with taekwondo that placed huge emphasis on restraint and discipline; Rockstar’s taking taekwondo with the same Kukkiwon and WTF affiliations – and we recently realized his instructor is wayyyy senior to when I used to learn. 

Posted in Rockstarisms | 2 Comments

A Little Miss Walked Into Tree…

Tree.

Tree.

Finally made it back here with Little Miss toddling in ceremoniously. Walked into Tree (the cafe in the furniture store on the 28th floor of South Horizon Plaza) and proceeded to sample all the sofas in the place.

Rockstar and I used to come here so much when he was in Kindergarten. With un-travel-friendly Miss (gets car sick, can throw up almost on request, information “overload”s when you least expect it) I held off bringing her back here before she could walk and follow instructions a little. (Belatedly I remember Rockstar used to meltdown here on occasion so wha’m I talking about, but well, he didn’t used to throw up real easy and messily nearly so often.)

This is the Tree For Lunch post I wrote two years ago. C really went back to the States with Cherub. Then when Little Miss was born I received a beautiful care package while still in the hospital, that included a soft toy anteater (never seen one before or since – Little Miss still plays with it which is saying something because like Rockstar, she doesn’t have a “lovey” or “security blanket”), a onesie with the word “sayang,” a book about the aerodynamics of paper planes that kept Rockstar busy in the hospital etcetcetc….. I hope she’s still reading. This one’s for her because this is what the new Tree looks like, still with the best baby breastfeeding room and changing facilities after branded goods outlet and baby and pet supply shopping…

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Little Miss goes to town in the new play area…. Because why shouldn’t there be more fruits in washing machines and diggers in microwaves…  IMG_2679

“It’s gonna blow! Run…!”

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They’ve also got flowers here now; with Kings still away and me trying to swing all the Xmas decorations I came away with the (now traditional for us) yummy-smelling wreath of Xmas tree leaves, since I decided to do away with getting a real tree each year in favor of something that doesn’t require a tree dying… But I still wanted to have that pine smell…  IMG_2702

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And of course all way out Little Miss has to test the sofas and beds and various chairs as well….

IMG_2764 IMG_2780

I would call this bunch of action shots reminiscent of Britney Spears’ “Stronger” music video with the chair dance (which is wayy tamer than Miley-anything) but I don’t want a Britney-anything comparison either…

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(Yes Little Miss swung an outfit change. Best place in the building for one, after rolling around on sofas and rugs and things on various other floors…)

Posted in Rockstar Shots, Traveling With Rockstar | 2 Comments

Rockstarism #291 – Apples and Bubbles

#291

One of those days when Little Miss throws a nutty… This time it’s because she refuses to leave Rockstar’s half-eaten green apple from Pacific Coffee on an evening we suddenly realize we are late for a dinner appointment. Was trying to leave it behind because she was throwing JD’s new Rogz ball with one hand, holding the half-eaten apple in the other, and I’m pretty sure switching hands.

We go back for the apple, bundle kids and dog into the lift, then when JD trots ahead to the car I realize she is no longer carrying her new ball. Rush back into said lift still clutching Little Miss still clutching half-eaten apple and the auntie who’s just gone in goes “Aiya! What is it ahhhh…” Turning, I kick the ball through what is now a rapidly closing lift door. Kings and I stare at each other in dismay as the door closes with me, the Miss and the apple still inside.

“Aiya never mind lah you wait awhile la…” That’s when I realize the auntie’s finger is still on the door close button. When I lunge for the door open button she goes “Oops never mind lah you wait lah.” “AAAAAAARRGGGGHHHH!!!!” Completely unphased, she exits her floor still going never mind lah you wait lah you wait lah (come to think of it why couldn’t she wait instead of hitting the bloody door close button.)

Rockstar (to us): Why are you still holding that (probably dirty) half eaten apple?

Me (still annoyed, to Miss): Happy now? Got what you wanted?

Little Miss: <happily> Ap-ple. 

<pause>

Rockstar roars with laughter. We show up for dinner mirthful, if late. It’s the first time she’s said the word. Rockstar spends most of the ride getting her to say it over and over again.

Still exuberant from her previous triumph, Little Miss then identifies a square.

Still exuberant from her previous triumph, Little Miss identifies a “squ-ahh”.

——————

Looking at a picture in a book….

Me: Look, Little Miss, your favorite! Ball!

Little Miss (a little reproachfully): Buh-bble.

 Me: Huh. Fine. Another intellectual snob.

Rockstar: (without looking up from Youtube-ing) Oh, was it really a bubble? So she was right? So why did you say –

Me: Because I didn’t know she knew “bubble”. And trust you to totally pounce on that. Yes, Mummy was wrong – (to Miss) what?

Little Miss (a little reproachfully): Buh-bble.

Me: Yes darling, very good.

Little Miss (a little reproachfully): Buh-bble.

Me: Yeah, yeah, now I know you know. <Rockstar makes eye contact with me expectantly> You were right, I was wrong, it’s a bubble not a ball.

Little Miss (a little reproachfully): Buh-bble.

Me: Snob.

Rockstar: Good girl, Little Miss!

Me: Both of you. Trust you to approve.

Rockstar: (turning back to laptop) I do, actually. Of course I do. Good girl, Little Miss <nods approvingly at her>. 

Little Miss: (giggles delightedly) Ko-ko-ko.

It’s sometimes a little weird, Rockstar’s whole carriage and seriousness in that tiny kid packaging…

Even if he still does this

Fortunately he still does this

  

Posted in Rockstarisms | 2 Comments

Signs Of The Friday Times

1) Rockstar found this on Youtube last night and wants me to lead with it today:

Insane Domino Tricks. My favorite entry in the comments to these two kids was “you’re either prodigies in school or you’re getting Ds in everything” 😀

2) 17 creepiest things kids have said. Most are hilarious. Some are creepy. Then you get to the reader comments and it starts getting really, really creepy when some readers start sharing their own experiences.

creepiest-things-children-have-ever-said-11

3) Signs of the times Vintage ads that would be offensive today.

Speaking of creeps...

Speaking of creeps…

If you thought the visual was bad, read the small print in the ads in the link.

“Indoors, women are useful – even pleasant…”

“…..7-up is so pure, so wholesome, you can give it to babies and feel good about it… Notice that all our ingredients are listed…..”

4) Contrast that with “buckle up to get down,” Virgin Airlines safety video. Or, how they got 7 million (and counting!) people to watch the airline safety video – when they weren’t even on a plane. My favorite part is How To Put The Life Jacket On – Robot Style. Thought the nun was overkill though…

http://youtu.be/DtyfiPIHsIg

5) Sunny Obama knocks over toddler in White House. Sunny is the first family’s new dog. What’s funnier than the fact this made news were some of the ironic comments, like “black dog knocks over white kid” and “whether the White House covered up any previous ‘vicious dog attacks’ by the First Family’s dogs.”

pic from Huffingtonpost.com

pic from Huffingtonpost.com

5) Madoff Henchman Rats Out Co-Workers

I used to coin the phrase “as long as it pays more to be a crook than an auditor/regulator you will get first-rate crooks and second-rate auditors/regulators” so it was with great interest that I read about “an external auditor at KPMG” who picked up on Madoff Henchman’s slip up comment that they only retained the end-of-month trades prices and pursued it. (And then the bits about duping said auditor by putting newly printed still-warm documents containing the prices said auditor persisted in seeing in the fridge after throwing them about “like a medicine ball… …so the documents would look used” were just…. very interesting. It goes to show the extent at which some people did go to in order to fool the auditors/regulators.)

pic from dailybeast.com

pic from dailybeast.com

6) The Goldfinch is a fiction novel that revolves around a real 250 year old painting of the same name. “The picture is real, it exists, the story is not really…” All in the interests of finding something to talk to Rockstar about, re his latest learning unit about stories being a way to express ideas and experiences differently.

7) This week’s 5-second skit is titled: Little Miss Does Magic (she makes her hand disappear!)

Step 1: Insert hand in carton used to hold her animal magnets

Step 1: Insert hand in carton used to hold her animal magnets

Where did it go? Where could your hand be?

Step 2: Ask volunteer from the audience to hold carton

Step 2: Ask volunteer from audience to hold carton

“Issa hand!” when she pulls her hand out. This trick totally cracks her up right now.

Rockstar pretends to be impressed....

Rockstar pretends to be impressed….

In between being impressed, Rockstar turns and whispers to me, “I actually know how the trick is done!”

Have a good weekend…

Posted in School For Rockstar, Talking To Rockstar, The TGIF Posts | 1 Comment

Rockstarism #290 – Sisters And Gems

#290

Rockstar: Mum. Lemme tell you something. If Little Miss offers you something you have to take it from her fast. Otherwise, she hits you with it. Seriously. (Little Miss retaliates) Ow.

We decided the best retaliation was for Rockstar to get to defend himself by taking away any balls, wands, katanas Little Miss digs at him with. Otherwise she was starting to really milk being the younger child. 

Rockstar loves meting out this particular punishment. Offending toys are returned with wordy, fusspot lectures.

Now, if we could just figure out what he can do when she sits on his head…    

*shrugs*

*shrugs*

———————–

Rockstar: Mum. Can I have one of Little Miss’ gems? Please? (Friend in school) wants it.

Me: See? And who was it who was once worried baby sisters weren’t any fun? Where else are you going to get gems? <Rockstar nods in agreement> And how come your (very macho, with boy sibling) friend wants gems? This is the second time you’ve been after gems for your friends.

Rockstar: <authoritatively> We all use gems we find on the playground, be-cause the girls are always dropping them, but then I said I have a little sister and so they ask me. When they’re building (Lego or paper) dragons, especially Little Miss’ blue gems look really awesome on dragons!

Me: O….kay, so sisters are good for something after all.

"I bet HIS little sister didn't get in trouble for drawing on his face"

“I bet HIS little sister didn’t get in trouble for drawing on his face”

Rockstar: <gravely> No, no, not all. They have to be the little ones. (Other friend)’s got an older sister. That’s no good. They’re too old to play with anything interesting AND they’re bossy.  

How many big sisters do we have out there? 😀

ps: I told Rockstar he has to always ask, but most of the time he can have the leftover 3D gem stickers from some wildly un-age-appropriate mosaic jewelry box I got Little Miss… She’s been peeling them off and we’ve been finding them in the most unlikely places anyways…

pic from amazon.com

pic from amazon.com

  

Posted in Rockstarisms | 2 Comments

Bumblebee Goes To School For Story Book Day

**Updated on 4 Dec 2013

Obviously, I just wanted to get as much mileage as I could out of Rockstar’s hard-to-find-ordered-ages-in-advance-off-Amazon.com Bumblebee Plasma Cannon (which is actually Bumblebee’s fist) we got for Halloween. You’re supposed to go as a book character…. unless you can find a book about the character you want to go as. Does that make sense? Yes, as a matter of fact, it do. Why?

BECAUSE BUMBLEBEE PLASMA CANNON.

Bumblebee wears school fleece because the bus stop we walk to to get on the bus is usually the coldest part of the day/journey

Bumblebee wears school fleece because the bus stop we walk to to get on the bus is usually the coldest part of the day/journey and why yes, he just woke up. As usual 😀

Rockstar was a little bored of Bumblebee (I know. He’s spoilt. They should put spoiled kids in jail because I’ve had too much caffeine) and originally thought of going as Iron Man because one of his friends had lent us the readers, but I couldn’t find anything to add a little “oomph” to the recycled 2-Halloweens-ago outfit. YES, HE CAN STILL WEAR IT. Sigh. The Iron Man and Avengers readers however did inspire me to go looking for Transformers readers (hadn’t occurred to me they even existed before).

Quite happy to have discovered these, because Rockstar is naturally very heavily skewed towards non-fiction reading – he went through a phase of looking out for the Mr Men during Kindy, which was great at that age because instead of coming away with the impulse-bought toy (Legos!), we often left a mall/store with a Mr Men to add to his collection. I consider this a reflection of what a good parent I am which is usually about when parenting gives you that much-humbling kick in the self-esteem and you get a call from the principal’s office about your child doing drugs on the playground.

So NO I DON’T CONSIDER THIS A REFLECTION OF GOOD PARENTING JUST DUMBBB LUCK THAT I AM PARENT TO MR ANAL RETENTIVE and this is how we do the whole superstitious ward-off-evil signs in Parentingland and Starbucks while younger child naps. Because if you don’t do this and you don’t get called about your child’s drug-trafficking on the playground <various signs to ward off evil> your younger child will then wake screaming and proceed to be a terrible person, necessitating you leave St. Arbucks and the rest of your turkey-and-cranberry sandwich behind as suitable sacrifice to the pagan gods of parenting.

Wow, the Christmas season gingerbread latte is lethal. 

But Mr Men. Turned out to be a blessing in disguise I hadn’t simply bought Rockstar the whole complete box series (cos I’d bought like, 10 books, before then realizing you could buy a whole set), because it became a game to find one he didn’t have yet. Of course, once or twice we ended up buying duplicates. (See how I warded off evil there?)

So here we go

So here we go

Not... to be confused with comic books, you understand... Who knew readers were that much fun?

Not… to be confused with comic books, you understand… Who knew readers were that much fun?

Rockstar read these things really quickly, like, 4 or 5 in a night when I first got them. At least for the Avengers ones we borrowed. I could only find 3 Transformers ones at Toys Club. (He devoured those too).

And ok, there was another thought going at the back of my obsessive compulsive mind: Dress As A Book Character Day also marked the end of Rockstar’s weeklong Youtube Fast (item 6 in this post). I was looking for a relatively lo-risk chance to do a little erm, revision on the lesson: Can he hold it in if his friends hog his cannon, jostle him playing with it, don’t give it back for awhile, etc etc etc? Or if it breaks?

(I consider it a good opportunity because while the cannon is of some value to Rockstar, it’s not “over-the-top valuable” – Halloween is now over, Rockstar’s had the chance to play with it for some time already, it’s however still attractive enough to Rockstar’s friends that some might run off with it for awhile longer than my fusspot firstborn stipulates. All-in-all a very attractive relatively “controlled environment practice run”. I know – sounds a lot less weird when I’m referring to stress testing of some derivative investment product 😛 but if I’m honest then this is what went through my head <sheepish>)

Me: You know there’s a chance if you bring it it’ll get trashed, right?

Rockstar: <rolls eyes> I….. know…… They do that stuff all. The. Time. <been-there-done-that-it’s-terrible-but-I’ll-live-if-only-just-barely sigh>

Me: OK so you understand: You just came out of having given up Youtube time for a week. You wig out again especially so soon after your last stunt you’re looking at a much heavier punishment. Plus, people might not believe you next time you give your word you’re not doing it again, if you break it so soon after. Still want to bring it?

Rockstar: <gravely> Yeah. I’ll be…. prepared. (Kind of with the weight of his decision on his shoulders)

I wasn’t very. I was saying little prayers throughout the day, especially since Rockstar oversleeps that morning (which he does almost half the mornings because he finds it hard to get to sleep at night) and as a result I’m the one holding his Plasma Cannon and speed walking to the bus stop while he’s trying to finish his breakfast sandwich because he woke literally 8 minutes before we got out the door (those mornings you’re basically putting a school uniform on a still-asleep rag doll of an offspring who towards the end of “getting dressed” would have woken sufficiently to be giggling somewhere in the depths of the school fleece you’re trying to get on), when the first of his friends sees it and starts messing with it.

Bumblebee or Incredible Sulk

Bumblebee or Incredible Sulk

This sets off The Incredible Sulk who wanted to be the one to show it off at the bus stop and so I hurriedly snap at him to get ahold of himself because it just so happened he’d overslept from having a reunion with his beloved Youtube and in the first place this is a practice run for controlling his temperand bundle a slightly less sulky Transformer onto the bus after he takes a final bite of his sandwich.

(It would turn out I needn’t have worried because practice run for controlling temper was even more of a controlled environment than expected – Rockstar would tell me later there’d been an announcement over the PA system before playtime to leave all wands, swords, light sabers and plasma cannons in class before going down to play, to avoid injury. I…. hadn’t thought of that. It was more efficient than those public schools you hear of in the States where they have the metal detectors in case their middle schoolers “g*ng-b*ng”***SEE BOTTOM OF POST FOR UPDATE. Which is kind of great, since the chances of g*ng-b*ng-ing and someone getting shot or stabbed with a Harry Potter magical wand that lights up and makes magical sounds are lower. (Touch wood! They are, right? Because we’ve got one too, Little Miss waves it around a lot at feeding time.))

And SO, in slightly breathless tones, Rockstar would narrate how his friends had come dressed as everything from Peter Pan to the Cat in the Hat (“BIG hat. Huge.”), to Leonardo of the Ninja Turtles, to Kai of Ninjago, to various Jedi….. And I was just amazed at the getting kids to find reading fun. Rockstar would later tell me they all showed off their costumes and talked about what characters they were…… One friend was “a very dressed up shark and his mummy read a book about sharks – he was a really, really cool shark.” Rockstar is not a Disney or Dr Seuss person, so he learned a lot of other magical book characters, that day.

And at the end of the day, books are awesome. And, to my heavily non-fiction-skewed firstborn, fiction can be awesome.

ps: Speaking of Halloween, there were people who asked me if we went for Rockstar’s school Halloween since I didn’t post about it – yes, we went. Yes, there was a post in my drafts folder. The reason I didn’t put it up was because it was heavily skewed towards The Cheese Brothers, the clown show that has been at Halloween for both years we’ve been at Kennedy School and I didn’t want to give the impression that was the only thing going on that night – there’s a lot more. Thing is, both years, it’s virtually the only thing we’ve really seen because Rockstar never leaves the clown show. He’s not for the spooky bits (though he loves the spiders), he wandered in randomly his first Halloween at the school, and hasn’t wanted to leave since. We buy several hundred dollars worth of tickets each year because Rockstar sits in the show back to back and a lot of the time we’d like to get to sit in there too. 

Bumblebee and Cheesie (someone please scream at me if this is not ok to put up, it'll be gone immediately)

Bumblebee and Cheesie (someone please scream at me if this is not ok to put up, it’ll be gone immediately)

Little Miss was there too. And "Put it away, Mu-umm" (Rockstar's expression is because I kept trying to take pics of those two during the performance)

Little Miss was there too. And “Put it away, Mu-umm” (Rockstar’s expression is because I kept trying to take pics of those two during the performance)

***Update: “G*ng-b*ng” refers to this term I picked up from this piece of art by (I think) a middle-schooler:

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The theme of this exhibit at the Children’s Creativity Museum (formerly Zeum) in San Francisco was the American Dream, which I posted about when we visited there, and I’d then used the term in this current post thinking it conveyed the whole metal-detectors-in-American-public-schools tone. However, an eagle-eyed reader (thank you) then warned me that the official Wikipedia meaning for the term is quite cringe-worthy and so I went back and cleaned my text so it wouldn’t show up on a google search. 

(And btw I sometimes don’t link things for the same reason; I don’t want some sites to find me easily. I’m aware some of these may hurt say, my Alexa ranking, and I dub this the paradox of the mummy blogger – on one hand you want to record your parenting and talk about your kids, you don’t want a bloodless blog, on the other hand you then have to give up a little on the “commercial” side because I challenge that it is very, very difficult to produce a popular, fast growing blog without attracting haters, spam or some other form of the scum of the internet universe.)

Posted in Rockstar Thoughts, School For Rockstar, Talking To Rockstar | 2 Comments

Battle Hymn Of The Tiger Brother, Dragon Miss

Decided to put up a pic of how they end up drawing on each others’ faces. Or, more accurately, how Little Miss ends up drawing on everyone’s faces (because Rockstar doesn’t do it to her at all).

Big Brothers' Faces Are For Drawing On

Big Brothers’ Faces Are For Drawing On

Rockstar occasionally comes up with a…… “Lesson Plan” for Little Miss. Once for e.g., it was a sheet of paper with lotsa different shapes, and he’d written instructions: Color the circles blue. Color triangles yellow. Color rectangles red, and squares green. This never works because firstly Toddler’s Learning Level – Rockstar has absolutely no idea what’s age appropriate for a then-16 month old, he’d expected her to color in the various (crookedly drawn, I might add) shapes on the paper. Little Miss uh…….. only knows circles and occasionally squares. I kinda tried to distract them after, because the next thing that happens is Rockstar gets mad she “doesn’t do anything.” Then the next thing is he’ll take it as a personal affront that she’s not listening to him. (I find this really funny, unfortunately, and I have to pretend I don’t when he’s around.)

Secondly it then didn’t take long for Little Miss to realize she can especially get under her brother’s skin by NOT doing whatever it is he might try to teach her.

But it’s good fun to watch her cap and uncap pens for him, and yes occasionally attack him with a marker.

She's actually shivering in this pic as she tries to get the cap off because he's put it on tightly

She’s actually shivering in this pic as she tries to get the cap off because he’s put it on tightly

(Come to think of it, that last Frida Kahlo uni-brow incident might have been payback for Rockstar trying to lecture her about Chinese words “stroke order”. I just realized that’s actually still on the board. Here’s a stroke for you. Take that, Koko.”)

Though one child is a party animal and the other a too-serious anal retentive fusspot who must have his personal space (at the last dinner we were at, Rockstar amazed amused everyone with a whole bunch of space facts like “Uranus is the coldest planet though not furthest from the Sun because a huge meteorite crashed into it and knocked the heat out of its core” at which point I added “a-and so it’s possible Little Miss shall be my only hope for grandchildren” – don’t you think we should totally do standup? 😀 – before crashing from low blood sugar (not….. that he hadn’t eaten, which was why we didn’t immediately realize he hadn’t put away the massive amount he usually has for dinner), they’re still a little related.

They’re both small and often mistaken for younger than they are. Rockstar is very serious and driven about getting work done. Little Miss is……. pretty determined too, at the moment. Her battle of choice currently? Meals. It is absolutely awful to feed her. After much flat-out crying and lots and lots of vomiting both from the crying and from deliberate finger-down-throat inducing, with the whole living room smelling of vomit, we finally got her to sit in the feeding chair and eat with minimal carrying on. For now. God forbid we try to do that anywhere else like outside the home. You can imagine what vacations are gonna be like. Fun.

So, I’m not sure I want them to decide to fight about learning stuff.

Well, just as long as she can still draw on her brother, I suppose. That, he doesn’t mind.

Well, he gets his own back. (She is not girly - he's ribbing her about girls playing princess)

Well, he gets his own back. (She is not girly – he’s ribbing her about girls playing princess)

Posted in Rockstar Shots, Rockstar Thoughts, School For Rockstar | 1 Comment