We first got to know SorLo for his thoughtful, heartfelt posts about family, then quickly noticed his passion for music as well. His daughter (and this is probably gross understatement) is pretty good with a violin.
My girl is 11 and now attending ISF Academy, one of the IB schools in Hong Kong.
1) How would you describe raising a child in Hong Kong today?
It’s hard to generalise. 10 people will have at least 11 different opinions. The greatest problem here is that people tend to admire over-achievers – the sooner, the more and the quicker, the better. Raising a child in HK can be tough, or easy. It really depends on the parents. If one chooses to go the tough way, fine. Who can say Amy Chua is wrong? (By the way, I do find the Tiger Mum’s self-defence in her interview with NPR interesting)
The bottom-line however is that it is not always easy to keep one’s sanity. Parents (myself included, of course) are naturally greedy. When the kids are strong at Math, parents will want them to be good at music too; if the kids have a talent in music, their parents will want them to master 3 languages… (add sports, martial art, singing to the list). High achievement, which is supposed to be a rarity, is now a ought-to-have, if not a must-have. Failing to see and accept that one’s own child is not bound to be among those who are capable of reaching certain height is a problem here (and in many big cities I believe).
About raising a child in HK generally, again it’s hard to generalise. Here you can find the best of the eastern and western worlds, and the worst of both worlds. It can be a real treasure to those who know what they want.
2) Particular curriculum, class size, physical layout/facilities, ethnic demographics, results in exams, commitment to extra-curricular programs, sports/music/arts programs, homework, private tuition, training/qualifications/dedication of teachers, whether the school is accredited by an outside organization (CIS, IBO etc)
Which of these are more important to you when making a decision involving your child’s education and why?
My girl’s school is new IB school (Diploma and MYP only, no PYP) which is known for its Chinese/English immersion programme and having small class size (15/class in primary school and 18/class in secondary).
As a hopelessly subjective man, I care about things that may not be important to many other parents. For examples, I absolutely hate “Simplified Chinese”. I call it “Deformed Chinese” (邪體中文) and insist that my girl should learn “Traditional Chinese” (Proper Chinese, 正體中文). I have little respect for schools that chooses to teach Deformed Chinese. The adoption of Deformed Chinese is to me proof of bad taste and lack of sound judgment. Why any school administrators should prefer anything so ugly to something so beautiful is beyond me.
It doesn’t matter to me that ISFA doesn’t have a track record. At least ISFA is not teaching the kids evil stuff when they are 6. As to why we did not choose a local school for our daughter, I won’t say they are not good. As a matter of fact many of them are excellent by any objective standards. I just don’t like them. Years ago we did apply to schools like St.Paul’s Co-ed. However, after attending a few briefing sessions and meeting the principals and other parents, I let the application forms go straight into the litterbin. Hum, what should I say? They are just kind of boring…
Having ruled out the boring and the ugly, there are not too many choices. Finally we let our daughter go to ISFA. Luckily, everything turns out fine.
A number of parents will complain about the homework load at ISFA. Whilst I won’t say the workload is light, it’s more about time management and self-discipline. Once the kids have established a homework pattern, things should be manageable. Our daughter used to hate Chinese and didn’t do well in her Chinese and Chinese math. It’s taken her 5 whole years to have enough basics under her belt to start to appreciate the language. Yes, there were times that she needed to struggle with Chinese, but I believe that she’s learnt something out of the struggles. She hasn’t got any outside school tuition. It’s not that we are against extra tuition. We will make extra tuition available if she tells us that she needs some, but only if she wants it.
As for extra curricular activities, she has violin lessons and Tai Chi at school, and, no and, that’s it. We give her a lot of free time so that she can do things she likes (like reading, swimming, walking the dog…) and learn to manage her own time. She has indicated that she wants to learn painting. We’ll get her a painting teacher when she wants it badly enough.
3) How important is learning music and/or playing a sport as a supplement to your child’s education?
When it comes to music, I’m biased, hopelessly biased. I don’t care how my girl does in a math test or a science assessment but I’d feel bad if one of my or our daughter music lessons does not go well. I managed to totally forget about our daughter school report (twice), but she never missed a violin lesson.
When she was young I insisted that she practiced everyday. It was almost religious. Even if she did not want to practice, she had to take the violin out and wipe off the rosin residue on the table.
To me, music is something above other earthly things. I don’t care about music exam, winning competitions or playing at Carnegie, but will feel grateful if our daughter has music as a friend. Learning an instrument is not easy and requires a lot of patience and endurance, which kids do not naturally have. It’s tough, but hard work pays.
4) How important is learning an additional language like Putonghua, Spanish, French (or other)?
To us, not learning Chinese and English is not an option. If our daughter wants to learn a third language in upper high school, it is up to her.
5) Everyone’s children are different, and what helps one child excel may not work for another child… What decisions are you especially proud you made regarding your child(ren), and why was this particularly well-suited to your child?
We genuinely trust our daughter and let her develop at her own pace. If we can claim 10% credit for her self-discipline, empathy and patience, we’ll be very proud of ourselves.
