Raising Rockstar

You know that feeling you get when your kid does something selfless, and you are just praying for that miracle of affirmation to your kid?

Yup. Right here.

Each child had a basket of balls to throw…

…onto a table that looks like this. Note the yellow “grand prize” square at centre. It’s erm, important 🙂

Now, skill has little to do with this, because those balls are light-as-air, bounce off the edges and roll everywhere, making it near impossible to plan a shot. Also, Queen E traditionally wins bigger prizes than Rockstar does, by flinging balls with joyous abandon, all over that table.

We used to call this game “Entertainment Cost,” not unlike the analogy I use for basic gambling – beyond a legitimate throw (i.e. one that lands on the table), you have no real skill or knowledge to help the outcome, and what you are really spending money on is the excitement and entertainment of tossing a ball randomly and seeing if it lands you a stuffed animal, usually hideous. In other words, you do not go into this with the aim of getting a large toy on the cheap (or making it rich, in the case of gambling) – you pay money to throw balls or dice or watch pretty horsies thunder down a track. Not unlike the money you spend on movie tickets (hence the nickname “entertainment cost”)

This evening, Queen E turns up nothing, while Rockstar for the first time scores three “small prizes,” – tags to be exchanged at the end of the game for toys. The pink unicorn Her Highness has her eye on is worth two tags, and upon reading the redemption guideline Rockstar immediately gives her the two she will need, keeping just the third for himself. (I swear, I did nothing to influence that; in fact, when he does it, along with that little glow at his selflessness, I feel a little terrified – what if he regrets it and feels he’s given too much, and then swings the other way, not sharing anything in future? What if Queen E prattles some thoughtless thing at his gesture, simply because she goes on and on about everything? Rockstar’s never won more than one small prize at this booth before..)

Rockstar: (When we’re about to leave) Mum. D’you think I could get a few more tries? Just to see if I can win anything else? 

Me: Sure – try a few more. <still a bit scared>

Rockstar wins the Jumbo Grand Prize in the next few throws.

We are now staring at a choice of a(n expectedly hideous) huge goldfish-thing with bulging eyes, or a yellow Shopkins character (I would also call this hideous but the Shopkins People might be upset.) The stall lady tries valiantly to convince Rockstar to go Shopkins, “It’s the only one left, everyone wants this thing, whatever it is, and you can’t get it elsewhere.” (I especially like when she says “whatever it is” 😀 )

Queen E, also Queen of (too often) Unsolicited Opinion, jumps up and down excitedly, “Get the goldfish, get the goldfish, Ko-ko! It’s bigger than me!“ (Kudos for her being unreservedly happy for her brother in his moment of triumph too, even as she hugs her little unicorn tightly)

Rockstar continues to hesitate, and so I ask, “The one you really want is the narwhal, isn’t it?” (The blue thing in back of the second picture). It is a lesser prize – the “Large,” rather than “Jumbo Grand” prize. And it’s the one Rockstar happily goes home with.

So many learning opportunities, in so few minutes. Would you take the goldfish/Shopkin just because you could, even if that wasn’t what you really wanted? Would that make you truly happy, or simply happy enough? And what happens to what you really want, then? Are you depriving yourself of something that is ironically more attainable and which would make you even happier than the “harder-to-achieve” item, by going after something “just because you can”?

One of the beauties of “demand and supply” (about everything, from derivatives to soft toys) is that the value someone else puts on something – in this case hideous goldfish/ Shopkin vs narwhal may not necessarily be the value you put on it. And that can be just awesome.

(No idea why this is her pose with “Uni”)

And so Back To School begins with Rockstar waking to a narwhal, and Queen E being greeted by a unicorn off the bus. Queen E, not surprisingly, has found a new love of unicorns 🙂 So are we grateful for our blessings, this Easter.

Have a good week back, dears…

ps: Did the rockstars go camping over Easter?

Is that a tent? Coming soon…

pps: Someone asked me why Queen E doesn’t look that happy in the first picture where Rockstar has given her two of his tags. She was initially saying something like “But I didn’t win that myself”

Rockstar’s school talk re social media and gaming. They’ve had maybe 3, this academic year, including when you bring your child’s devices in, and what can I say – A ship in the harbour is safe, but it’s not what ships are made for; yet nor do ships leave the harbour without checking the weather report… You can’t escape technology, it’s everywhere especially in your child’s world, but you can’t exactly say “yes” to it all either, without first availing yourself of all the guidance from the school (because your kid’s school should be in the unique position to give you the best picture… There are people who make lots and lots of this information available to you for free, for which they have put so much time and effort researching and preparing materials, so you can get it on a platter at an after-school seminar, because your child attends the school and you have to y’know, parent your child alongside the tech.)

So anyway, tech talk. All the slides in this post are from Rockstar’s school talks by the Learning Technology Specialist, and this is not a post to regurgitate everything (also, not everything is here, not by a long shot :), it’s a story of our efforts to parent alongside the guidance and trainings the erm, trained people give you.

So video games

Lots of Rockstar’s friends actually have serious gaming consoles – beautiful machines hooked up to even more beautiful wide screen tvs – and so, friends who actually know Rockstar might be amazed to know that….. we don’t. Yup, “hardcore” computer nerd Rockstar does not have a gaming console. Minecraft and Scratch is what they have in school, and so it’s what he gets at home as well.

Oh, think your kid can’t get enough “good stuff” if they stick to these? Oh yes they can (unless they’re already very used to playing other games). There is a whole smorgasbord of clean and very engaging entertainment out there. When Rockstar visits his friends’, he plays whatever they’re playing (so yes he gets other games then). When his friends come to our home, they play what Rockstar’s playing. And here’s an eg of some other entertainment. This is the original It’s Raining Tacos:

This is what kids are able to do with it on Scratch:

It’s one of the things Rockstar loves to do online, check what other kids can make. (Also, there are Nerf pellets all over our home in places we never knew existed so maybe this is why they don’t request the games we don’t have :P)

Not… that Xboxes are pure evil like we all know ice cream is (haha no, not really), but it would’ve been an additional “fight” in our home.

This slides says something like that too…

In the same way my erm, idea of your own little “hell” is if you only feel satiated when you eat junk or do stuff that’s bad for you (think how beautiful life would be if you liked veggies AND knew they were good for you), I had this obsessive-compulsive idea to enforce the gaming equivalent of. With…. s-ome level of success – Coding tends to revolve around games. So we had to let some in. But well, as the school tells us, all games are not equal.

There’s the thing: When your kid is learning (tech) stuff at a faster rate than you can you have to get out of the way, pay attention to the school tech safety talks… And do what they advise. (For eg, no outside accounts the school can’t monitor or else you’re just asking for it.) The least we could do though was stick with ones the school approves, monitors, or even incorporates into lessons – the kids use Minecraft for number sense, to build virtual worlds to illustrate their understanding of ancient civilisations, et al…

At one point I also tried to read this, but could barely get through half – its very very scary, the true stories. If you read this…. (pic from Amazon.com)

…..you will really want to do this. (pic from school tech talk slides as an eg of what NOT to do)

My favourite thing at the Kennedy School talk that evening was re the 3,000-word watch list connected to our kids’ school accounts (including variations like “Sh1t”) – an email containing any of those words doesn’t go to the intended recipient, it goes to the Learning Tech Specialist.

Beat that, Hogwarts (pic off Youtube when the age-old stone statues guarding the school are brought to life by Prof McGonagall to battle Lord Voldemort and his army)

(What I really want to know is how to get them to do this for all the non-school related stuff too hahaha)

For real though, see the details on some of these slides – how many FREE tech courses have all these under consideration

I especially liked “anyone can post anything”, and “your likes can define you.”

Rockstar’s t-shirt says “I just ate a sandwich – 13 people ‘like’ this”

There are slides on Xbox controls, Cyberbullying, a horrifying statistic (with references) re 22% of teenaged girls having shared nude or semi-nude photos plus a guarantee that they are pretty much always shared…..

And therein lies the inconvenient truth: there is no more effective deterrent out there than…. parenting. (Sorry). There are so many risks out there, you can’t switch the parental controls (ironic name alert) on for them all. You have to instil in your child not to want to do it.

To borrow an analogy from the talk, in a slightly different context: just because you know how to break a window doesn’t mean you’d do it. Just because your kid is tech-savvy and literate doesn’t mean they have to necessarily be online even when they come of age. There are lots of people who are… legal but don’t drink or have casual sex or etc. Being “technologically wholesome” should be another – no, maybe the most important new value we need to include in our parenting today.

Exercising restraint from thoughtless clicking, texting, ripping/downloading et al should be as much a no-brainer of an easy judgement call on our kids’ part, as them not going to the actual strip joint, saying those profanities (or other hurtful stuff) out loud, flashing someone for real. 

Why? Because the end result is the same. Someone still gets hurt. 

ps: Still playing catchup… So much to tell, so little time to get online. Stay tuned dears…

#396

When the answer to each of these is “Uh…..”

Rockstar: Mum. You know when they ask “Which comes first, the chicken or the egg,” and people always think it can be either one? That’s not true. It’s actually one and not the other. Want to hear why? The answer is Evolution. D’you think the prehistoric creatures evolved into chickens or eggs? 

—————————————————————————————————–

Rockstar: Mum. I just thought of a paradox. “What I’m telling you is a lie,” is a paradox. It means you’re lying about lying. But if you’re lying about lying, then you have to be lying about lying about lying, and lying about lying about lying about lying, and it just keeps going on… 

—————————————————————————————————–

Rockstar (in story-telling voice): “Little did my sista know, as she was petting JD, that the dog actually hated it…”

Queen E: My brudda needs to go to therapy.

Rockstar (like he was uninterrupted): “…and she secretly wanted to run away…” 

Queen E: <shrieks in fury>

—————————————————————————————————–

Rockstar (because Queen E likes animals): You are the Animal Queen.

Queen E (mock indignant): I am not, I am the Noise Queen.

—————————————————————————————————–

Rockstar looks at us and snorts…

Rockstar (to Queen E): Who dressed you?

Queen E: Mummy.

(We love embellished hairties as comfy bracelets to jazz up any outfit)

Rockstar (to me): Who dressed you?

Me: Queen E.

Rockstar: Your outfit is better.

Queen E: Yeess!

Me: What?? I dressed her fine ok!!

Queen E using my Pokemon Umbreon hoodie tail as a scarf

Queen E came home from school one day and gave us an earful about how we use wayyyy too much paper and kill too many trees.

She uh, suggested this as an alternative “because you can always wash it off”:

(She also said “Betcha can read what I write on my face”)

I have seen this before. Every night in our household when we try to get the kids into bed 😀

(For real though, isn’t this what we all hope our kids’ll be in sports… and life… just… maybe not at bedtime.)

Young Kazakhstan Boy Refuses To Cross The Line In Tug Of War Competition
https://youtu.be/eUAbGmtbw4M

Where a kindy-aged Rockstar once said, “Worms fly, because birds eat them,” Queen E is more, “Worms fly because we want to. And thanks in advance for catching meeeeeeeee!!!!”

Rockstar: Hi…. YAH!

–

–

Queen E: Hi… Catch Me.. AH! 

(Note delighted way she runs off)

Would that we could all throw ourselves that faithfully into the week… Have a good one, dears…

(Queen E was totally psyched to be allowed to try a “jumping kick” in her brother’s advanced class one day…)

Queen E adores Emma Watson’s outspoken Hermione from Harry Potter who, keenly aware of being muggle-born (born of non-magical parents and in later movies subject to persecution by those of “better” birth), works harder than any of the more erm, privileged magic-born children. In one of the alternate time lines of The Cursed Child, she even grows up to hold the most-high post of Minister of Magic. Her honest effort and hard work paying off, she earns her rightful place in the (safely fictitious, thus very useful for talking to little kids about issues like racism) magical world not by virtue of birthright but instead sheer grit and diligence.

So you can understand my mild apprehension when THIS image started popping up on promotional posters everywhere

Which is why we had to go watch it. (Be warned though, you’re burning almost 2.5 hours, but while I don’t really enjoy these kinds of shows, I would recommend going if you have kids, because their friends’ll surely talk about it, and the movie does have a lot of thought put into it, many thought-provoking conversation opportunities.)

Sure enough, the moment Belle appears onscreen, Queen E goes “OMG she looks so much like Hermione“… Note to self: please let Watson not turn into another Miley or Britney before her shine with my daughter wears out….!

Queen E has been asking, “So after we get married, the boy has all the power?”

Enter Gaston, whom “every” girl wants.

You want?

Some reviews mention that “Gaston” is n-ot quite beefy enough for the role, but what Luke Evans lacks in sheer bulk he makes up for with his acting 🙂 The whole fawning over Gaston thing however is good for a lesson that achievement alone does not a good person make, and in fact all that fawning can make it very hard for a person to remember to do right.

“Gaston,” just before BnB came out btw, was visiting one of the most vulnerable slum communities in Mumbai for Save the Children – pic from savethechildren.org

Gaston has some choice lines, including the proverbial description of his women as “prey” and how he’s willing to forgive Belle her bookish-ness because of her beauty.. He also has an evil masterplan: Suck Up To Belle’s Father So He’ll Let Me Marry Her, And If That Doesn’t Work Then Get Rid Of Him So She Has No One Else To Take Care Of Her, And Will Thus Have No Choice But To Marry Me. His logic when attempting to convince Belle is, “Do you know what happens to spinsters in this town after their fathers die? They beg on the streets… like poor Agathe over there…” (Queen E was, “is that why these people dress so strangely” haha)

This is how the world is changing (for is there no greater way to tell what the world is like  today than by what its citizens (and especially their children) get to watch:

1. directors make a point of highlighting in press interviews that they are throwing a nod to the LGBT community in a big budget children’s production
2. “princess films” illustrate the absurdness of little girls being described “odd” (whole songs and film dedicated to thiszzz!) if they like to read
3. “poor Agathe” the village spinster-hag no one wants to listen to turns out to be the powerful Enchantress who started it all by turning prince into Beast for being unkind to the less fortunate, who saves Belle’s father after Gaston tries to kill him, and who has been watching over the village and its levels of bigotry ever since. (Hillary Clinton is so last season).
4. In a word: LeFou. Gaston’s fluttery sidekick-turned protagonist, and both kids’ favourite character after the Beast (and in Queen E’s case also “Hermione”)

This guy is just fabulous.

Gay Or Not was so not the point. Director Bill Cordon did himself, the movie and the actor a disservice by diverting attention to that. (How many more points do we lose by diverting attention to THIS one).. The movie screening in Malaysia has been delayed by Malaysian censors wanting to take out “the gay scene” and Disney refusing to do so. (I’m still a bit… Which scene? Because I assume they’re referring to the LeFou Fawning Over Gaston bit, but if you look closely enough (thanks for that, Bill, I would not have been looking out for it if not for your remarks) there’s also a fleeting cross-dressing scene where the Talking Wardrobe tells this young man she has outfitted in a wig and pink dress, “Go, be happy!” as the young man then skips off delightedly. The same young man dances with LeFou in the finale. So, which scene do they really have problems with again? 🙂

(In case you were wondering, Rockstar’s attitude is Yah Some Boys Like Playing Dress-up But It’s Just Not Something I’m Interested In… Unless It Involves Superhero Costumes With Gadgets That Are Sick.)

(Lego Batman in the latest Lego Movie loves Tuxedo Dressup Party!) – pics from dk.com and screenrant.com

But wait, one megalomaniac at a time. As you were so fabulously saying, LeFou?

…Even as Josh Gad steals the other show in that scene, as the fawning protagonist who, despite his adoration for Gaston, is able to see him for who he really is in the end… thus – wait for it – earning Rockstar’s respect (pic from digitalspy.com)

As Josh Gad does his thing, Queen E turns to me and declares “I like this guy a lot more (than Gaston). He’s so cute.” Rockstar later observed, “He’s the only person in that village who could see Gaston is bad. What’s wrong with all these people?” (Btw, in another delicious “poor Agathe”-esque irony, “LeFou” literally translates to “The Fool”. The one they name The Fool however is the only one of Gaston’s hangers-on in the village who is not a fool.)

Rockstar had a point about The Fool. And I had the opportunity to point out to him that pack mentality and just basic human folly mean that popularity and niceness can easily be mutually exclusive (though of course we can always hope not). 

(If you want a more…. classic illustration of the sheep-like quality of mobs, check out Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar – Mark Antony’s Friends, Romans, Countrymen, the powerful oratory punctuated by slightly differing contexts of the phrase “Brutus is an Honourable Man” turns the position of the gathered townsfolk 180 degrees, from condoning the assassination of Caesar, to angrily seeking “justice,” intent on killing Caesar’s assassins. Yes Shakespeare uses sarcasm – more someday, because I have a love-hate relationship with Rockstar’s natural…. snarkiness :P)

Ok, next one – speaking of crowds, and community, and doing the right thing, being kind – sometimes you have to be brave, in order to be kind, is how I put it to Queen E. Author Emma Thompson, in her role as the Talking Teapot, explains to Belle that in saying nothing, allowing the prince a.k.a. Beast to grow up increasingly spoiled and mean, the enchanted, imprisoned staff in the castle are not simply innocent bystanders after all. Notably, she herself has a very well-mannered little boy…. who runs in during the commotion following the Enchantress’ confrontation of the prince in the earlier scenes and is caught in the spell, thus transformed into the Talking Teacup..

Emma Thompson as the talking teapot – pic from eonline.com

“Poor Agathe”-who-is-actually-the-all-powerful Enchantress, has a lesson to teach the villagers and the castle staff (some of whom later turn out to be the long-lost family members and spouses of the villagers) – you have a “moral obligation” or “greater calling” to others but especially to yourself, not to allow injustice, for choosing to do nothing is also a choice, because no one really lives in a bubble after all, and so it’s going to come back to bite you in the behind in ways you can’t possibly fathom 🙂

They “made (their) own bed and have to lie in it,” doomed to be talking furniture and antiques that increasingly become more inanimate, unless they can right their wrong, coaching the monster they created (in more ways than one) towards such virtue within, as to make outward appearances completely negligible and thus breaking the curse on all the castle’s inhabitants.

Oh, you think people can’t see beyond physical appearances “no matter what” in real life?

Nick Vujicic is an inspirational speaker who has, among others, moved many teenagers suffering from “body issues” like anorexia

Queen E really liked hearing about this guy, particularly when he described how he has no limbs and cannot walk, but he can fly. He’s been to almost 40 different countries as a motivational speaker (gave his first talk aged 17), was voted school captain aged 12 (in addition to being on the student council), and graduated with a double degree in Accounting and Financial Planning.

Anyway. Back to Beauty.

“Flowers?” pic from screenrant.com

Q: Who do you choose, the boy every other girl wants, or the boy everyone thinks is too hideous to live, but who really gets you?

(It also helps, that the village girls who worship Gaston are portrayed quite bluntly as fools with an exaggerated amount of makeup. The bit that might be less noticed however, is the disdain Gaston himself displays for them, the silly village girls, he shows them no respect.)

“No thanks, I prefer libraries” – pic from tracking-board.com

What was the question again, which boy do you choose?

A: You may choose neither. 

There exists a third option, kids. You Can Say No. No one gets to push you into being with them until you’re ready. And you can choose to not settle just for the sake of settling. Like every choice you will ever make, choices come with consequences of course, but these are no better or worse than others. As illustrated in the whole movie, “poor Agathe” is not helpless and dependent on the social pressure to get married, particularly if you aren’t sure of the person.

A very good indication of a person’s heart is how they treat you when they don’t get what they want from you or, for that matter, when things are hunky-dory everyone can look like a prince. A good indication of a person’s true colours is by observing what they are capable of in anger:

He’ll take it. (pic from screenrant.com)

Boy No One Wants saves Belle from wolves despite his anger after she wanders into and snoops about his living quarters, then walks out on him for trying to control her (hence roaring at wolves, above). And so she chooses to go back to him.

Boy Every (Other) Girl Wants tries to manipulate Belle’s father, then threatens him, then locks Belle up with him, and as Gaston manipulates the angry mob (even as LeFou observes who the true beast on the loose is), Queen E is howling at the angry villagers who intend to hunt down and kill Beast. Y-eah you probably don’t want to go to the movies with Queen E with her many, many opinions when you’re sitting in the cinema 😛

Beauty Is In The Eyes of the Beholder, You Are Beautiful By Your Actions.

A lot of life lesson opportunities; Queen E enjoyed it she really loved the Beast and LeFou, Rockstar’s verdict: “Meh movie, but the Beast was sick.”

–

–

–

ps: 

Yes I know about this.

Emma Watson came under fire recently for this photo for Vanity Fair. My personal opinion is, I wouldn’t wear it, but that’s cos magazine shoots and what works running after kids or well, living life,  is just not the same. (Also, Imma closet nerd, have you heard my views on promiscuity? Which is why I will not be trying out for a role in showbiz. *Cough*) 

In a nutshell, It’s Not Playboy, Why Are People Behaving Like It Is? Femen activitists are known for aggressively going topless, but Emma Watson gets flamed for this picture? Besides, her male co-star Daniel Radcliffe (Harry Potter himself) has been nude in the name of art (stage productions I think it was) for ages and at the height of HP fame, almost from when he was legal (in some interviews he describes himself as “17 and sh*t-scared”). I don’t remember anyone screaming as much about that…

Here’s another more positive inspiration: In Harry Potter: Prisoner of Azkaban, Hermione punches (!!) the snivelling Malfoy for getting a mythical animal put down after he fails to adhere to safety instructions when approaching the hippogriff (doesn’t listen to safety warnings Mythical Creature Studies Professor, said creature then rears up and claws him):

<sheepish> I have a huge chip on my shoulder pet peeve re kids and animals – naughty kid doesn’t listen to instructions/ mistreats animal, animal understandably bites back, animal gets put down, everyone fusses over the “poor kid”. One of the reasons we ended up with JD when we had no intention of getting a dog was because we used to wistfully drive up to this huge doggie compound each weekend, and invariably there would be kids begging and begging their parents for a puppy, “Because it looks so CUTE”. Please. I’m begging you. If this is your child’s only reason to want a LIVE animal, say no.

(So if you are one of those people who “always” thinks it’s the animal’s fault, stop reading. My kids are so hyper they fly off the furniture, run into or up the walls, scrawl on the piano keys or cupboards…… but they NEVER mistreat their pets.)

———————————————————————————————————

On a further aside, if you needed further indication of how the entire world is changing this generation, check out features editor of Huffpost India Piyasree Dasgupta’s scathing review of Bollywood romantic comedy Badrinath Ki Dulhania (Badrinath’s Wife)

pic from dnaindia.com

Excerpt: “…said lover boy picks up said lover girl, tries to gag her, stuffs her inside the trunk of a car and drives around as she begs to be let out. And all’s forgiven. Because, with two Arijit Singh songs that scream ‘What kind of a pathhar dil naagin can’t see this is love’, you’ve been asked to believe that the boy doesn’t deserve to be thrown into jail and be given two tight slaps.” 

I enjoyed the theme song dance sequence in Badrinath more than in Beauty and the Beast though, so after watching the Youtube (85 million views!) I was all Holi! Holi! Holi! Abs! Abs! Abs! – serious inspiration for that 6-pack

Here’s to a colourful, energetic week ahead, dears

Catch up post…

We had this…

Fully booked, with over 200 parents signing up – which is often the case because Sure, “Everyone” Knows How To Do Primary School Math…. But The High Likelihood Is You May Not Know How To Teach It To Your Little Kid, to support their learning at home. (We are especially dependent on the school’s tips and trainings because Rockstar has managed to reach Y5 without ever stepping into a math tuition class.)

These things, the school talks, are – get this – absolutely free. So we’re kinda guilty of feeling flush from the tuition money we save.. (Can afford lotsa other school stuff). Also, it occurred to me that the staff put a lot of effort into all these things so they must really think it’s good for the kids under their care (because technically the parents are not under their care as well haha)

So too, a first instalment of the talk…

This one was during a talk by Maths Professor Peter Sullivan of Monash University, who had been working with the teachers… They also then had a talk for the parents…

Among others, they had us use the kids’ blocks to illustrate fractions

After that I went home and dug up Queen E’s wooden shapes toddler toys 😀

What stuck with me after these courses is:

a) Learning math is like using a “muscle” – the more you use it, the more “buff” you are; so they have a lot of suggestions on how to introduce math games into your every day life

b) Don’t tell your kid “I was never good at math” because they’ll maybe think “Ok, so I won’t be either,” or “ok, so I don’t have to be”

c) They always have the parents go through the math exercises that the kids have to do (yes I know not a few parents who secretly feel a little intimidated by this haha) and… when you manage to solve a Y5 or 6 math problem you feel 10 feet tall. Seriously. You feel like you want to keep doing this. You feel you should do it when you’re getting on the mini-bus, you feel like you want to repeat your feat to the people at home….. in other words you feel like how your kid should feel, when you’re supporting their schoolwork. Gotcha! 😀

——————————————————————————————————

ok I feel like I need to make some amends…

Look Ma, no hands! The Partners in Crime do various experiments in a tub filled with Mustella baby oil because one of em has dry skin

Wait for it….

Yup, broke our shower. Not once…

…but twice. (Notice different coloured showerheads)

Its a built-in shower with the tube passing through the tiled platform. In other words, we are about to have major construction works in the bathroom for a second time. Y’know just in case you thought after the math bit earlier in this post maybe we were raising robots. 

Both kids are pretty hi-energy, and after watching them run or bounce about tirelessly, we’ve kinda decided to let them be monkeys. who they are. I mean, because free time is really important, which is why we don’t simply whisk ’em into all kinds of activities and classes one after another (I really do think too much tuition is more detrimental than useful – says the person who grew up with a lot of tuition because my parents and I had this deal, whereby I could take up any activities I wanted…… as long as I did the ones they wanted first. That meant I slept relatively little, and was out of regular class a lot, because – guess what – both parents and myself wanted to do a helluva lotta stuff. I had a lot of tuition by secondary school because I was often not in regular class, there were all kinds of activities I had to be out for)

But these two are just going to drive me batsh*t if they don’t have enough to do at home…

So after school Nerf date. *cough*

Queen E pops a few, but her real role is the important-est. She runs around with narry a care, in between all the lines of fire, picking up spent pellets in a ziplock and delivering the refills to the older boys. Since that’s what she really wants to do, I insist she wear her ski goggles (even though we have nothing that will even pop a balloon at close range).

This is Rockstar hiding in the doorway to ambush one of his friends (and behind him is the latest update of scribbles on our Graffiti toy Ikea cupboard that the kids can draw freely on.. )

(You may notice there is a lot more red on the scribble cabinet now… Because Queen E is in a red phase… y’know like when Picasso had the blue phase :P) and before anyone screams at me about letting these kids shoot up the place and random passersby/ neighbors (in school uniform some more), lemme explain that though there are regular anyone-can-join Nerf battles that go on around our huge development, our kids and their friends only do this in our or other friends’ apartments.

Dis issa rare pic in the doorway because they wanted to test the range of those things. our neighbouring unit is unoccupied, during construction works (yes, more noise)

We used to stick different coloured post-its around the apartment for different scoring (math!), but haven’t figured how to mark where the pellets hit without creating a serious mess (anyone have suggestions please let us know)…

And the raising of rockstars goes on…

(strides off into the sunset with….. is that a hockey stick peeking out of his bag? Story for another time… 😉 )

What tickles me is how many kids around us walk by and say, “Rockstar, you’ve taken up golf now?” 😀

ps: I became a lot more forgiving of Nerf guns after reading an interview with Nerf Ambassadors Dude Perfect, these strapping young college-age guys: they explained that the Nerfing and other ball sport trick shot activities kept them from the wild college partying that “everyone” seemed to be doing… A mum friend of mine then added that it also keeps the kids from too much screen time…

**Updated 27 February 2017; because we live in a city of (mostly) tiny apartments – not exactly pet friendly… So you may want to check out The Secret Life of Pets (more below)

Rewriting the lyrics to that Oldie but Goodie, Hammer Time.. 

Just before this photo, Queen E fell off the piano bench. Twice. She thought the first time was hilarious, so then she tried it again..

But wait. Go back. Around the cacophony and fidgeting…… The hamster fell asleep.

Eyes closed – what’s wrong with this thing?

Rockstar won’t admit he’s a little envious, but well, Queen E worked for it, he was busy with his tech. Interesting, because on the face of it Queen E is probably the most crazy energetic (read: scary) little kid to handle a small delicate animal –

which lil’ critter wants to be held by someone who moves like this with no warning (gif from giphy.com)

Seems it’s not only hamsters..

Me (after seeing this, which is from a Jurassic Garage visit to her Kindergarten): I thought you said it wasn’t very big. It’s covering half your forearm.

Queen E: It didn’t look very big. They don’t even let you put it on your bare skin. Because…. the legs might be.. scratchy <trails off>. Only on the sleeve <mildly disappointed>    

“What d’you have to say about this one?” (Yes she asked several times to hold him)

Queen E: Very cold and quite fat. And he’s a boy. There was another skinnier one that they said is female. 

Me: You know this one eats hamsters and other rodents, right?

Queen E: Oh. In the wild? I guess he can’t help it if he’s a predator. Hamsters are prey, aren’t they… <brightens> But he doesn’t have to eat hamsters when he lives here, right? We can feed him chicken nuggets.   

Cue Secret Life –

It’s a computer animated kiddie movie about pets living in New York, i.e. predominantly in small apartments. Some of it is erm, junk (but funny junk) – where the pets mess with the appliances, watch foreign language soap operas or have rave parties all day when their owners are out

– but some of it is useful for talking to the kids, about ageing pets, unwanted pets (cf “A Pet Is For Life”) particularly of the exotic variety who end up on the streets and in city sewers…

..and Tiberius the hunting hawk who has to fight his natural instincts to eat Norman the guinea pig and Gidget the white… Poodle? Bichon Frisse? yappy little dog (pic from wikipedia.com)

Anyway. So now it’s not uncommon for Queen E to go about her daily business at home holding Gemma in one hand. You’d think this means the poor ham is totally harassed, but you’d be wrong. When Gemma doesn’t want Queen E to pick her up, she lets out an awful blood-curdling, fingernails-to-chalkboard squeak. More like a screak. We can actually hear the thing from another room.

Hamsters are nocturnal, but when Queen E comes home from school in the middle of the day, if Gemma hears her voice, she’ll often start chewing on the cage bars to be picked up. And so it goes on til bedtime –

Gemma The Ham With An Attitude doesn’t do this with anyone else in the family, she appears to be umm, selectively narcoleptic. Even at night.

ps: Also note the keys of our cheap old electronic piano (still haven’t decided if piano is Queen E’s instrument, she does all manner of things with it other than actually play it). Yes she writes on the keyboard with abandon and marker, but is careful not to get the hamster’s paws caught between the keys (a few of us mums also have a designated wall/ piece of furniture that the kids are allowed to doodle or paste any number of stickers on with abandon which is another reason I can’t bring myself to change the thing (New And Pretty Stuff = Way Less Freedom For The Kids)).

pps:

Queen E: Are humans prey or predator?

Me: We’re the worst kind of predator, we don’t just kill to eat, we make coats and bags and even kill for entertainment and in the name of a “better-tasting” meal. I figure if you have to eat an animal all of it shouldn’t be wasted and you can stand to give up something in the way of how tasty the meal is, if it’s a more humane way to kill the animal…    

Queen E: What about eggs?

Rockstar <from his laptop>: She has a point… 

I… know. Everyone’s seen this. But go look at it again. It’s super long – 24 pages, at press time – but if you have a little kid who’s gonna grow up and enter this big bad world, go look at what the older kids stand at the door and say – not just with their name appended at the end but also with their picture attached.

When you see how the “head-covering squad” (one of them signs off “turbansquad” below) wear their cultures and faiths proudly in their yearbook quotes with wit and charm (arguably the best reaction to prejudices) to boot, you’ll understand why I reblogged this.

Alizeh Raza received the comment, “….what a bright and beautiful face!”

According to urbandictionary.com:

At a time when growing up is angsty and the world they live in with social media magnifies intolerance a lot of them flaunt honour what makes them different, be they race, religion, sexual orientation or just…. a healthy appetite!

…And teamwork. (“We know what you’re thinking and no, we’re not related”)

(Fine, some of ’em also flaunt their similarities)

And deliberate stereotypes…

Daniel Zhang received the response “Every Asian parent ever”.

Según Akigbogun received the comment, “…none but he himself may make that joke”

However, my favourite two (because Am I The Only Parent Who Is Already Receiving Smartypants Comments From The Kids About What They Are Named) are these:

And these two girls below, just for their whole healthy attitude (not… too many fries right?)

How many of you guys out there have one like this to show your kids now?

(I recently went to get more piercings (thanks for that, Queen E!) and ahead of me was this middle-aged man who asked, “which ear is it for straight men, and which for gay men?” ….below, both boys are double-earringed though, go figure…)

Lotsa respect, no judgement. (How can there be, from someone who calls herself Christian, who has a best friend in secondary school who is Muslim, whose parents are staunch Buddhist/Taoist, and who has a few gay friends in her history to thank for some big lessons in life?)

Growing up is hard, and then when you’re done with that, you suddenly discover that you have a lot more growing to do. I don’t know which is harder – being friends with no one, or trying to be friends with…. everyone. But don’t throw the first stone this week. And if people you don’t respect hate you…. you must be doin’ somethin’ right 😀

Good week ahead, dears.