San Francisco Through The Eyes Of A Rockstar (Part 8 – San Francisco Zoo & Safari West)

By some cosmic confluence of events, we scheduled 2 consecutive “animal days”.

(I cheated. This one above is Safari West, where we take far awesome-er pictures below. The zoo has something kinda like this too, but you’re a lot further away from the action)

Freezing cold at the zoo… The white-nosed coati is curled up in a dog basket.

We get the orange chicken and rice in Leaping Lemur Café (and the by now much-anticipated fortune cookies that come with)… You can see everyone bundled up outside…

Including the Rockstar

A quick glance around yields 4 lone dads with their small children. We encounter at least 2 or 3 more in the course of the visit.

Near the exit, yet another lone dad with three 6-8 year olds and another boy closer to Rockstar’s age on his shoulders asks us where we got the rented “safari jeep” Rockstar’s been riding in. We hand him ours and bundle Rockstar into the gift shop for the souvenir toy zoo jeep we promised him.

I speculate all the mums must be in spas after the holidays. Kings thinks they’re all single parents who take turns with the kids. Either way, we feel pretty silly whining about Rockstar’s high-maintenance-ness. He’s still just one rockstar.

It’s quite a nice zoo. It’s sunny, and the tall trees and giant branches landscaping the place are beautiful. We spend way too much time with the friendly goats in the children’s section and don’t quite finish everything else. Rockstar chides the donkeys for hee-hawing too much.

Sharing a gossip with nanny goats.

Next day, it’s the much-acclaimed Safari West. There aren’t many slots left, and by the time we show up several days after calling in, they’re fully booked.

Our guide is a senior at university, writing a thesis about the diet of 2 different kinds of mice (like I’m smart enough to make this stuff up). He disagrees with “many conservationists” who might protect a particular species of animal to the detriment of others (bringing in some species that could carry diseases affecting local species for eg). Wish I could go on, it was a fascinating, very meaty tour. But it was really hard to absorb stuff and keep an eye on Rockstar who occasionally roamed and gabbled.

Things that make you go AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

Baby giraffe

Baby zebra

Q from someone in our group: Why don’t people ride zebras more?
A from guide: Because they have really bad attitudes

Baby I-Don’t-Know-What-The-Freak-This-Is-Because-I-Was-Too-Busy-Messing-With-It-When-The-Guide-Was-Talking, who got obsessed with Kings’ shoelaces (he shooed it off when his feet started to hurt).

Also searched our bag pockets as we exited and loaded up on the jeep… and pecked at exposed hands hoping for snacks (we reminded Rockstar to keep his hands firmly in his pockets) – take note, Cute Overload.

The top seat can be seriously trip-y – there were parts of the safari where the jeep would tilt and the people on top would scream… Rockstar didn’t meet the (I think it was) 4 foot min height requirement to sit up top anyways

There were 3 or 4 jeeps, each seats about 4+ families, we spy just one other Asian family (speaking in an American accent), and an Indian family. One family in our jeep were local, and the others were mostly from other parts of San Francisco.

Don’t be fooled, these aren’t just your regular Kerbau/ buffalo (which they get mistaken for quite often), they are The Mafia Of The Animal World. So says our enthusiastic guide. They bear grudges.

They are the one animal the guide doesn’t try to move out of the jeep’s path. Another older boy who needs to find an outdoor toilet (strategically placed rock or tree) is told this is the worse time during the drive to try and exit the vehicle.

So, as he talks, I snap pictures. This doesn’t even look real.

Our guide says his jeep has been rammed twice because each time he shooed one of these out of his way they would walk a few steps, then turn and charge him. So no one looks at the Road Obstruction With Giant Hangup as he parks and tells us about the Battle of Kruger – filmed by American tourists who then tried to sell the video below to National Geographic, got turned down, posted it on Youtube. 6 million hits later NG apparently bought it. The price had of course appreciated somewhat. Consolation for them is it’s now at 58 million hits and counting.

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LU8DDYz68kM]

(If you’re squeamish like me, here’s the spoiler – after getting caught by lions and crocodiles before the herd returns full force to chase away each lion, the baby buffalo gets up and walks away.)

The Kerbau look-alike finally ambles off the path and we carry on.

Shortly after, Rockstar falls asleep. (Tour on foot is about 45 mins, in the jeep it’s about 2 ½. 3 hours, with all the questions everyone is asking our enthusiastic guide.)

It’s the return trip he misses. At least he got all half way before KO-ing.

BIGGEST LESSON LEARNT:

Safari West has a very low escapee rate. Why? Our guide explains, the only time animals “gamble” and try to escape is when their currrent situation isn’t good enough. Humans should be that smart. The animals know where their next meal is coming from, they don’t try to run and risk losing that.

As a result, when safari staff leave gates open, they get a “So, are you going to close that?” look from the inmates – with the exception of the ostrich, who can’t remember it gets fed regularly.

(And that myth about ostriches burying only their heads when they hide – there’s no need to hide, they can seriously KICK.)