So we land after a 9 hour flight and get totally reamed out by Immigration. There is (wait for it) an undeclared banana in our bag. Not just any banana, you understand – a Hong Kong banana. From the land near the land of killer flus and what-nots. I would be a tiny bit freaked too.
But really, we so richly deserved the scolding we got. This is a country that takes mighty offense in foreign fruit and we broke their law.
Here’s how we became felons:
Our helper helpfully put Rockstar’s half-eaten banana (and also a new one) in our bag – we didn’t know it was there and didn’t declare (or throw it away which is what we should’ve done because I don’t think they let you bring it in even if you declare it). It shows up on the x-ray. We get marched into a separate area where they go thru all our luggage. We hear mutters of “a banana” and wonder what that’s about right up until they find the offending fruit.
We are not fined the AUD 220. The customs lady yells at us a lot (me in particular, because Kings has a very blank poker face that makes most gweilo think he can’t understand them), says she is going to fine us, then doesn’t.
There’s a silence where a “thank you” should have gone because, believe it or not, I wanted the fine. We broke the law by a gross act of stupidity (we opened our hand luggage umpteen times and still failed to register the banana. Then we filled in the immigration form saying we had no food with us – it says right there it’s a legal document. We lied on a legal document and all we got was a scolding?)
I was silent because I was holding back the urge to ask why she wasn’t fining us. Only reason I didn’t ask was because she might start yelling at me again. And Kings might join her. (Fine, two reasons. I did start out saying I’m having a stupid moment right?) Kings gives me a dirty look when I mutter “we so deserved that” as we leave.
Here’s why else I wanted to pay the fine:
Remember Rockstar having diarrhea every 3 hours? He wasn’t taking in the prescribed “good bacteria” culture drinks prescribed by the doc because he hates most drinks other than water and milk (Yes! No soft drinks! Virtually no juice! (Our local pediatrician really frowns on juice – we are to ply him with lots and lots of water during fevers – they check the diaper quite stringently for pee concentration when we bring him in))
The evening before, it finally occurs to us to put the live culture in Yakult or Vitagen, which Rockstar does drink. A quick call to the pediatrician to confirm it’s ok and Rockstar is finally taking it in.
His last heavy bout of diarrhea is just before we leave for the airport.
We manage to nip into the Marco Polo Club lounge at the airport shortly before the flight takes off. They’re serving plain congee flavored with some dried scallop. We take some with us. Rockstar loves it and eats only this and the Vitagen-prescription live culture mix on the flight. He does no more number 2s til this morning.
What we expected to be a tough flight was very much not.
And Rockstar has been so deprived in the last week he’s going to be a lot easier to feed healthy nutritious stuff during this trip.
So what if the Karma gods decide that’s enough good fortune for the trip?
I am of course not serious – I’m Christian (oh yes, that’s right), I should remember I believe in God’s boundless grace.
See how this helps me get over my own hang-ups?
I don’t need to make it up by paying the fine.
THANK YOU MELBOURNE IMMIGRATION, FOR NOT FINING US
