The Shame On HSBC Pictures

Posted on December 7, 2011 by admin

Kings happened to be passing through Central and took these pictures of the current protest where people are camped outside the main HSBC branch… I think this one is directly related to Lehman Minibonds (succinctly put, the fact they were very much not “bonds”) and usually such protests are by individual investors (at retail level instead of say, institutional)…

It was just a little sense of deja vu because though I’d never touched the product, the general Minibond structure (there are actually many tranches) was a job interview question I encountered when I was pregnant with Rockstar

(Yes, really – I quit my previous place because in the wake of the massive equity (and therefore flow derivative) run and corresponding short-handedness on the desk I wasn’t sure I could hold on to an early pregnancy when many days it felt like blood was going to pour out of my nose and ears just from the pressure in my head to do the (fairly simple but requiring a lot of speed) calculations and pricing and executions and stuff all the trades in before market close – I took in a massive number of calories but was losing a lot of weight anyway – I quit at a BMI of about 16… Somehow it just never occurred to me not to work when I had Rockstar – I got myself hired pregnant at a different shop and was in the dealing room til 2 days before my late-scheduled C-section… Some Annoying People have quipped how my battling Legal & Compliance and certain i-bank sales (being stuck in between the 2 parties) during the startup of the new desk is why my son came out a monster of a difficult grouchy baby (pediatrician’s words, not mine).

Well idly I do wonder if that’s why Rockstar loves solving puzzles so much – I used to sweat over umpteen different derivative product term sheets figuring out what the structures did, and the baby would just kick and kick…)

Anyway. I was digressing, all that happened so long ago in another life… Today, the pictures speak for themselves (and I hope you don’t think I mean the text in the pictures) and it’s like there’s just nothing more you can say, there are just no words.

In the next generation no one will want to be in banking anymore…

Posted in aileensml | 9 Comments

Should I choose my son’s friends?

Posted on December 5, 2011 by admin

Or, My Son’s Good Friend Hates Me.

To some extent you always think how you don’t want your kids to fall in with reckless drivers/ drug dealers. Not….. That I think there are many in Rockstar’s Kindy class, but you know what I mean… And then there are the mums who are actively looking to set up playdates with interview-mates this upcoming holiday season…

I feel the need to point out not all my son's friends hate me.

 While that hasn’t been my preoccupation, I did note that most of Rockstar’s current favorites at school don’t share the same catchment area and would therefore be applying to different ESF primary schools. (Yes, like every living, breathing mum in Hk I’m nervous about interview season. But I’m also nervous about first term next year when Rockstar loses virtually his entire green-poop-for-snacks/mums-are-sad-when-they-have-periods bunch of partners in crime.)

So at the last birthday party we attended over the weekend, I was hoping to see if maybe Rockstar could be friends with other kids too. Things did not go according to plan.

Rockstar goes to sit with his regular friends expecting me to follow behind and that’s fine, the truth is I do like them and their mums (the ones I know, anyway), except when we sit down I discover a few of them are strict vegetarian for religious purposes, and Rockstar has slipped their boys his salmon toasties <awkward>.

Then as we all mingle, Rockstar gets into a fight over a chair. It is not too loud and ugly, but it is public and neither boy will relinquish. I’m furious. Though no one knows who started it, in this case it doesn’t matter as much because I specifically elicited Rockstar’s word he would not get into any fights this day. (Another mummy friend will later tell me the other boy is known to be argumentative, but as I said, Rockstar won’t always meet other little boys who aren’t. I do want him to learn not be totally anal retentive about everything and he’s not complying.)

Rockstar’s fight is public enough to leave me mortified and unwilling to meet any other new parents. But here’s where it gets interesting – Kings had been parking the car, during which time I leave Rockstar on “his” chair which his adversary has vacated to join everyone else in the birthday singing and cake cutting festivities, and while narrating to Kings just how furious I am when he’s back, a passing classmate of Rockstar’s gives me the evil eye. Beautiful wide hazel eyes fringed with the long lashes, flickering with serious angry ‘tude as I relay to Kings what has happened.

It’s one Rockstar’s partners-in-crime. Who is being raised strict vegan, whom Rockstar has slipped a salmon sandwich to, not to mention living really far from us and therefore going for an ESF primary school in Siberia. (Fine, to me, Siberia.) Trying to organize playdates next year, wherever we are, would be A… Joy.

Except… Am I the only one who caught how much my son’s friend cared about him getting in trouble that I am now Public Enemy Number One for “telling” on my son to his dad?

It doesn’t stop. Rockstar’s loyal friend now has a problem with me, refuses to cooperate for pictures I take, and btw – even today on school run I got a little scowl. Usually, this little boy runs up to Rockstar and is neutral with me, today I can see him waiting til I’m gone. (And btw, this 4.5yr-old being pissy with me is getting under my skin far more than any mums being pissy with me.)

Anyway. While I’m thinking about the Sometimes-Wonderful Innocence Of 4yr-olds’ Friendships at the party, another of Rockstar’s schoolmates is stuck up a slide. This boy is shy in class, and belatedly as I watch Rockstar and Loyal Friend cheering the other boy on and trying to get him to take the plunge, I remember something else – Rockstar used to tell me how he sometimes got the idea to keep an eye out for his shy schoolmate on the playground from Loyal Friend (who is a half year older than Rockstar, and one of the kids Rockstar describes as “smartest” in class – I realize later that when I mention how kind his friend is, Rockstar says “I said he was smart”; it would seem Rockstar uses the word “smart” to describe more than I realized).

I never gave much thought about Rockstar hanging with the “smartest” kids in class, but…. watching the two of them (joined later by another Partner In Crime) encouraging their shy schoolmate (and at one point getting dragged along the carpet on the upper deck when they try to get the boy to go down between the two of them and he gallops off with tiny Rockstar still attached to his wrist which they find hilarious)….. suddenly it occurs to me I’d love for my son to be friends with the kindest child(ren) in class. 

If all things are a package and we have laundry lists of what’s higher up on our Wants For Our Kids’ Friends, I’d go for the “nice” child, over the one who lives next door/ is his classmate/ has lotsa stuff/ is smart/ shares the same faith and culture/ other – any day. 

One of whom now thinks I’m Villainous Evil Mum Who Tells On His Friend. Wait! I want to say… Your mum told you off about sharing and not getting into fights at the school Beach Fun Day recently, I heard her… At least….. I’m almost sure that’s what she said in the Indian dialect she was warning you against being naughty in when you looked like you were getting in a dispute over sandcastle building…! Except I guess she didn’t tell on him to his dad… Uh, whatever. (You’ve gone round the bend, Aileen, are you obsessing over whether your son’s friend likes you??) 

So… it would seem Rockstar’s already picked his friends. And he’s done it with little regard for catchment areas, cool stuff – or for that matter skin color, faith, and – Who knew my son would be better at this friends-picking thing than I?

Except what the hell am I going to do about playdates someday, with the giant continent that separates these boys?

Posted in Rockstar Thoughts, Talking To Rockstar | 7 Comments

Our Material Dog

Posted on December 4, 2011 by admin

Mun (one of my super-regular readers and commenters – love her) had a very good question – no, JD isn’t getting a dog jacket. That was my gift suggestion for some dog’s owner. JD however, is a material dog. She loves presents. She knows the word presents. When Rockstar gets presents she knows how to bum impromptu chew toys off him and search his toy bin for hand-me-downs.

Spoilt Dog in attempted arty-farty shot while we were in the car

As part of the family, JD is entitled to a gift that brings her (not say, her owners) joy. Here is a list of her previous gifts:

Giant weird-smelling (but apparently delicious to her) ham bones and things from upscale pet shops

Really gross-sounding squeaky rubber chicken (couldn’t stand it. Traded her for a can of tennis balls – balls are always a good option if you have a BC)

All manner of Kong toys (those rubber things you put treats in and stuff – we spent an obscene amount on these til one day we watched her hook her paw nail into the rainwater drain cover on our balcony, dig it out, and start playing with that. It was…. humbling. Hence,

D-I-Y store drain covers

Pink Bean Bag (she hated the rustling, asked for her old dog basket back; the darn bean bag was like HKD 800 ok, it was meant to look good with the rest of the apartment decor, it became Worst Gift Ever)

Pink faux fur Victoria’s Secret rug (USD 17.99 on offer online or something. Loves!)

Pink-and-black polka dot fleece blanket to line her basket

G.O.D. hot water bottle cozy in shape of pink squid with pom-poms

Ikea octopus soft toy

(In case you’re wondering, she likes to shake toys that flail about satisfyingly, hence her preoccupation with tentacles. The octopus’ name btw – yes, it had a name – was Sotong. Sotong literally means cuttlefish/ squid, maybe also octopus,  in Bahasa; but to Malaysians and Singaporeans calling someone a “Sotong” is a colloquialism for calling someone absentminded or a little daft.

Anyway. If you told her “Get Sotong,” or “Kill Sotong,” (we nixed “Kill Sotong” post Rockstar), JD would repair to her basket in our bedroom, fetching Sotong out for a good shaking. I had umpteen blurred photos in my old laptop of Sotong abuse, will put some up if I ever have the time to go digging for em – we haven’t decorated our tree yet. May Sotong rest in peace. (How long do you think soft, tentacled toys last when your dog shakes them like she’s killing a rat?)

This year Rockstar wanted to make up a goodie bag of dog treats for her, we were going to shop at the Hong Kong Dog Rescue store in Aberdeen (they have a really good range of various dog treats and chews – hoofs, tendons, Roo meat, Lamb……) so we’ll do that in time for Xmas…

When they say It’s A Dog’s Life, they might mean it’s a joy…
Posted in Rockstar Shopping | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Gearing Up For December

Posted on December 3, 2011 by admin

So Xmas shopping. I haven’t done very much. I know I want to. Like when Rachel’s trying to fly to London to break up Ross and Emily’s wedding and she forgets her passport but can tell the counter airline ticketing lady “exactly where it is on (her) nightstand.” If you do not know who Ross and Rachel are, you are too young for this blog. But seriously, I usually go nuts at Christmas, it is my Absolute Favorite Celebration because it is the one where we have zero obligations to parents and etc – thereby allowing us to do whatever the hell we want, form our own little family tradition. No One Cares is sometimes music to my ears when it comes to extended family obligations.

Tree shopping

But well we got the tree. Yes, I saw the “Why does a tree have to die every time you want to feel the Xmas spirit” Facebook comment. We got to Lily’s Flowers with me still undecided about getting a real one (was also hoping to find something in a pot), except as we climbed up stone steps past umpteen trussed-up trees, I let the excuses come: They’ve already been chopped down (and imported in from the States). You don’t do this every year, you’re usually traveling at Christmas. You can’t even remember when was the last time you bought fresh flowers, because of the whole they’re-already-dead thing. This is the first tree Rockstar remembers. HELL, just out with the number one selfish reason already – YOU LOVE THE SMELL OF REAL CHRISTMAS TREES. 

There were actually wayyy more trees but this seems to be the only shot still in my cellphone <sheepish>

Why smells are so dear to me now will be revealed eventually. Like Danielle Steel, I shall attempt to drop clever hints every now and again, in what is supposed to pass for the unfurling of a plot <cough>. The tree btw, is HKD 1,200 – quite a bit more expensive than I remember from several years ago and a slightly smaller tree (under HKD 900 I think), bought in Great supermarket, Pacific Place (I mention, since this is atas supermarket – come to think of it Wellcome Westwood has 6-7ft trees for HKD 888 this year – we passed some guys shaving off the trunks so they fit the stands, in a cloud of sawdust.) But well I had forgotten at the time what trees cost and the service from what looks like a family business here – there’s a little shack set up where they are all having lunch when we arrive – is good. They offer to untie any trees we want to look at, and then they get out the feed and entertain Rockstar at their fish ponds.

I think you can hardly see Rockstar for the Auntie entertaining him tho… But I wanted to get the poinsettia in the shot…

As for gifts…No real surprises, No. 1 Kiddie Gift This Season according to this Bloomberg Article is….. an iPad.

Yes, yes, Gwenn O’Keeffe, Boston pediatrician who has studied the effects of technology on children and works with the American Academy of Pediatrics doesn’t recommend iPads for kids under 2. (Hah! Rockstar was probably about 3 when he started! We did something right! The Obsessive Parenting Gods shalt award us a point!)

There’s other gift giving going on too – Rockstar has another December-born classmate who has a big party over the weekend and so when we went shopping I got, “I asked him what (he) want(ed) for his birthday and he said Red Truck Please. So you have to get red.” We can swing that, sure.

I had to find some way to drop that a girlfriend told me at the most popular international school here, you would be looking at say, HKD 4,000 bikes – I’m still awestruck that a 14-year old girl’s birthday party goodie bags included silver pendant-and-necklaces from, wait for it, Tiffany’s. Us kucing kuraps get candy or little toys, much to Rockstar’s delight. In fact, let’s get two trucks. <Feel so generous.>

OK so for us mere mortals here are a few more things I liked:

This Little Piggy Went To Prada

All of USD 20 from Shopbop.com, for the girl who, while joyously celebrating her new motherhood status, guiltily finds a tiny bit of her mourns The Carefree Shopping Days of Pristine White Gucci Cruise Handbags and Linen That Can Be Stained By Baby Burp Even If Your Baby Just Looks At It. (What, have all the Laws of Nature and Physics already been discovered and written in stone?)

(I know That Girl’s in there somewhere. Deep down. Like, maybe a shrink can reach her through hypnosis. I can’t remember without digging in, what it’s like anymore to not have a child, how would I remember what it’s like to shop like I didn’t have one? Well anyway I didn’t make good money earlier in my working life (you would be amazed at Kings’ and my starting salaries), that came from 6 or 7 fairly aggressive job changes (each) so almost when I could finally afford the white Gucci was when I could no longer afford the white Gucci. By the time I could pay for it comfortably, it wasn’t much longer before I could never use it comfortably, for baby Rockstar.

Marble Run from Wise Kids

Rockstar’s getting a serious wooden marble run, because the much cheaper plastic ones keep coming undone which means he hardly gets to do any marble-running. I can spend a small amount of money on an un-marble run, or buy a real one. Rockstar is constantly fascinated by how the marbles navigate the maize, how they slow down in some places, and I smelled an interesting conversation about friction and momentum and gravity, so…

And maybe this book just because. It’s cute!

Metropolitan Museum of Art New York store is having a sale for a day, so I’ve been busy; who knew their MetKids Store had so much stuff?

Kings of course got me the iMac (and I an Hermes tie but as with all my early gifts I will usually end up getting a second gift for him closer to de date, what with all the festive), so my gift to myself will be a clutch that I can put the laptop in. Because I have a perpetual back problem that I’m too lazy to get fixed at the chiropractor’s and can either resort to backpacks all the time or carry empty-save-for-my-wallet-and-sanitiser nice shoulder bags. (Have you any idea how hard it is to find a trendy backpack?)

Ha-ha the Chihuahua (No really, that really is his name, he’s 4yrs old and a rescue dog from Lamma Island – it’s so nice when we meet all these former rescue dogs living the good, over-dressed life)

And last but not least – the nicest dog jacket I’ve seen in a long time – custom handmade, recycled materials, reversible, and keeping a shivering chihuahua cozy next to our table this morning (it’s about 12 degrees Celsius at the Peak). Our neighbors got it here.

And then in church today, we heard the pastor say, “The best gifts aren’t the ones you want, they’re exactly the ones you need….” It reminded me we brought baby Rockstar home from the hospital on Christmas Day 2007. When I hadn’t even known to want a child, just a crazy all-consuming career, we were blessed with the Rockstar.

Posted in Rockstar Shopping, Rockstar Thoughts, Talking To Rockstar | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Rockstarism #175 – My classmates are all smart

Posted on December 1, 2011 by admin

So to date Rockstar doesn’t take any classes outside of ESF stuff (Kindy hours + ABC Music through the school), except for a weekly hour of Oral Putonghua with a bunch of local kids he likes, which I consider a “paid playdate” (he gets a Putonghua Day weekly in school and we get updates plus I think a newsletter on the parent website). However I’m aware quite a few mums would look at Phonics, Math, Art etc classes, so this is what happened at an early attempt at getting from the horses mouth whether he might need a little extra help to keep up with his classmates:

In the bath after school one day…

Rockstar: (Classmate) was throwing books around during quiet reading time so he got sent to (principal’s office).

Me: Oh, do you like quiet reading time?

Rockstar: Yes, it’s quite interesting.

Me: Do you think you might need any extra help to get your reading up to speed?

Rockstar: O-kay…

Me: I mean do you think you need any extra classes to keep up? More school? Just cos some of your classmates’ mums told me they’re going, so I was wondering if you needed it. Some of your friends are a lot older than you to begin with, I assume they know a lot.

Rockstar: <patiently> I go to school, Mum. E-S-F. It’s quite good. 

(I know! It’s funny when your almost-4 yr old authoritatively tells you his school is “quite” good!)

Me: Umm… Are you keeping up alright with your classmates?

Rockstar: My class is very smart. They read very well. They are all smart. 

Me: <thinking: he didn’t quite answer the question but let’s just go with it> Erm ok, who’s real smart?

Rockstar: (Classmate). (Other classmate)….. (Other classmate, other classmate….. <pause> Other classmate, other classmate, other classmate – pretty much names as much of his class as he can remember to rattle off while innocently floating a row of boats in the tub.

Me: <suspicious> Everyone’s smart and can read really well? Ok, who’s the smartest?

Rockstar: (Classmate)! (Other classmate)! (Another classmate)!

Me: Those are your best friends in school. Is that why they’re the smartest?

Rockstar: Yeah! Cos they’re my friends. 

Me: Are they your friends because they’re smart, or are you saying they’re smart because they’re your friends?

Rockstar: They’re my friends because they’re really funny. They make me laugh.

(Btw this is the fart-joke/ green-poop-for-snacks/ mums-are-sad-when-they-have-their-periods brigade he’s talking about. But I like that he’s chosen friends who make him laugh… Not say, friends who have a heap of cool stuff.)

Me: Ok. I still have no idea if you’re keeping up alright or if you need help.

Rockstar: I can learn from my friends, Mum……

<pause> Mum. Do you know the difference between tortoises and turtles?

Me: So what, this discussion is over, you’re changing the subject? No I don’t.

Rockstar: Yeah hee. Tortoises live on land and turtles live in water. So tortoises are heavier. If they try to go in the water they’ll sink. But (my teacher) told me this. (Guess he means he learned that from his teacher, not his friends)…

According to his school report that came out sometime after we had this conversation, he’s basically doing well… But getting him to say, tell me he is doing even f-airly alright is like trying to get water from stone… I have no idea what’s up with that. And here’s another we also had some time back:

Rockstar: We did Room on the Broom in school! It’s fun!

Me: That’s wonderful! What’s it about?

Rockstar: <seemingly reciting very carefully> It’s-writ-ten-by-Ju-lia-Don-ald-son.

Me: Umm, ok, so what did you learn?

Rockstar: <in same tone> I learned, it’s-writ-ten-by-Ju-lia-Don-ald-son.

Me: Uh, anything else?

Rockstar: I… can’t remember.

Me: <exasperated> Then how can you remember you like it???

Rockstar: <patiently> Be-cause, it’s-writ-ten-by-Ju-lia-Don-ald-son. <nodding reassuringly> I learned that in school, Mum.

Overheard a bit later the same evening, to himself:

Rockstar: I am a bird, as green as can be.
Is there room on the broom for a bird like me? 

Me: What did you just say?

Rockstar: I was a bird in school. <starts doing something that I suppose passes for flapping about looking for a lift on a witch’s broom> Well, actually a parrot. Green parrot. (Classmate) was the witch. (Provides some description). (Other classmate) was the dog. (More description). ………………….. Carries on for quite a bit, at which point I don’t bother reminding him he was supposed to have forgotten everything.

Finally:

His Most Proud Achievement: Almost Being Able To Wink

Rockstar: But Mum. I can’t remember anything else.

Me: Ok yeah sure.

(Like, why bother?)

Posted in Rockstarisms | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Annoying Things Parents Do In Nice Restaurants

Posted on November 29, 2011 by admin

So we often sit in the outdoor areas of dog-friendly restaurants, because we try to include JD on as many family outings as we can. As in, Ocean Park ever allows dogs in their dolphin shows, you’d suddenly find us there a lot more often. I’m this close to writing in the HK Wetlands Park for a dog day-pass except after all my impassioned petitioning (she only herds things on 4 legs! Your pigeons and crabs will go unmolested!) the dog might eat some rare endangered bug (solely as a reflex, you understand, she can’t help snapping at things that buzz by) and people might get a little upset.

Rockstar’s constant presence around JD regularly earns our dog attention from families looking to allow their kids a quick dog fix without the commitment. That’s FINE, we entertain kids coming up to our table to play with JD all the time, unless the dog indicates she’s had enough.

Proper Table Manners. Ahem.

The outdoor seating area in restaurants where dogs are allowed however, is also the smoking area – not a biggie most of the time because most smokers try their best to keep the smoke away from Rockstar, a gesture we much appreciate.

Now here comes my pet peeve – the Let’s Dump Our Misbehaving Children With Our Helpers In The Outdoor Area While We Enjoy Our Expensive Lunch Indoors Gesture. Uh, newsflash – the meal costs the same indoors or out, at the restaurant we experienced this anyway, and your inconsideration is robbing other diners of their enjoyment. (Any cares? Probably not?)

I have to blog this because I missed the chance to tell those kids/helpers/mums off. (Not really fast enough cos I was so taken aback by the kids’ behavior here.) So we’re sitting out at a nice restaurant and two, four, six (I think) kids aged about 2 – 8 come trooping out to our dining area, some of em rowdily bashing each other on the head with their complimentary balloons-on-sticks. Rockstar stares in amazement, I in disgust, as I watch the 3 or 4 accompanying helpers do nothing but stand around very passively, occasionally throwing an obligatory half-hearted “don’t do that” drowned out by the squealing as all these newcomers to our seating area crowd over.

That is the one time I scowl before the dog does, at the unwanted attention she is getting. I must look like Marie Antoinette to the slacking helpers, icy look on my face above my HKD 150 Calamari appetizer. But they look at my face and keep the kids away from JD.

Not good enough. I should’ve said something. Because from seriously rough balloon-stick fights, those kids graduate to waving their balloons over the steam of our Hot Plate Seared Tandoori Seabass, left at a side table near ours so the sizzling can subside a little.

I’m speechless as a balloon hits our food. It is btw, the oldest child (not the youngest) that hits our food with his balloon. The helpers standing around look a bit uncomfortable but say nothing, make no move. Their parents btw, are all seated and dressed nicely, unruffled, inside. (I know re dressed nicely because a mum and later also a dad step outside to tell the helpers to stop the worst of the balloon fight, and again when one child’s bawling is so loud in the outdoor area it interrupts the lunch of their parents inside. I recognize color-blocked Marc Jacobs cashmere. Immaculate, freshly applied makeup – rich red lipstick. Pearls. Chanel.)

Uh, any better?

I would be surprised if those (Asian, in case you were wondering – and their parents speak Cantonese and English) kids were not attending some of the more exclusive, expensive international schools in Hong Kong – just a guess, from their English (articulate and grammatical), clothing, etc. But they are some of the most ill-behaved children I’ve seen in restaurants to date.

It occurs to me time and again (having also read similar in Peter Buffet’s Life Is What You Make It), how disturbingly similar the behavior of “neglected” rich kids and their poor counterparts are, I once quipped that your young child might not make that much of a distinction between whether you were at work all the time, or in jail. These kids were certainly “privileged,” but eyeing the impassive helpers standing around, it occurred to me the quality of the “parenting” they were receiving was far appalling to “much less privileged” families whose kids had more involved caregivers/ parents.

Anyway. The helpers do nothing until I remark loudly to Kings that I am about to complain about the disruption of our own dining pleasure. Rockstar is still watching avidly and I say, “Don’t you pick that up. They’re all banished from where their parents are sitting because of their red choices to begin with.” Rockstar’s defensive, “I wasn’t going to do that. I was just looking.” 

OKOK just digging in. Zip.

When I look back, the helpers have herded the children to a different outdoor area – to annoy less bitchy patrons.

But seriously, how selfish is it, to come for a nice meal like everyone else, and then farm off your misbehaving kids plus umpteen helpers to crowd a different part of the nice restaurant where the patrons have well, not brought along their own misbehaving kids/ dogs/ turtles/ whatever. In the outdoor area even when the dogs yap, their owners attempt to politely quieten them…

Also, a suggestion – if you are moneyed enough to say, go expensive international school and possibly work so hard you have to be away, leaving your child with a helper all the time, why don’t you just hire a professional nanny? I don’t see the logic in dropping serious dough on education and branded clothing, and then placing the majority of your child’s care at home in the hands of someone who is greatly incentivized to simply take the easy way out when it comes to addressing bad behavior… And btw, I’ve met a Kiwi professional nanny at Playtown in Pok Fu Lam, describing how she motivated the 15 month old in her care to pick up colors say, via every day stuff like laying out 3 outfit choices for her each morning, I thought she was a much better way to go. 

Posted in Rockstar Thoughts, Talking To Rockstar | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

I’m TELLING on you….!

Posted on November 28, 2011 by admin

If you didn’t guess by their facial expressions, this is my dog telling on my child. For reasons known only to her, JD had decided this evening she didn’t want Rockstar to touch her cheeks. Of course this just makes him want to do it more, so she’s come over to me vegging on the sofa in front of bad reality tv to complain.

Rockstar is posing for a pic while deliberately annoying the dog for the camera. And yes, dog and child regularly take turns yanking each other’s chains. Sometimes, it’s hard to believe they aren’t the same species…

And yes we remind Rockstar constantly 1) not to push his luck 2) not every dog is JD

Posted in Rockstar Shots | Tagged , , , , , | 4 Comments

ESF Kindergarten Beach Fun Day At Repulse Bay!

Posted on November 27, 2011 by admin
Front cover of Beach Fun Day “Participation Passport”

7.30am, heard throughout our apartment, “I’m up! I’m UP! Are we going yet? Let’s GO-O!” Rockstar proceeds to race excitedly around the apartment followed closely by our Border Collie with the ole’ herding instinct kicked in. 

If you were driving to Repulse Bay Beach last Friday at 9am and wondering why traffic going in was just totally jammed up, PLEASE BLAME US. Our part time driver did, “This place is never jammed at this time, must be all you Kindy Beach Party-goers.” Which is when I start noticing turquoise-and-navy uniforms. Oops. Rockstar is in his school fleece jacket to be sure (over a wetsuit top – it is 20-22 Degrees Celsius and windy, though it’s a fine day), but he’s also sporting his favorite bright red swim trunks with scuba diving penguins on them. He had a choice of navy-light-blue floral, or the penguins and he chose the flash, “The penguins are cuter.” Like any responsible parent <cough>, it’s his fault:

“<earnestly> Tomorrow, don’t wear school uniform, just wear the hat. And wear Crocs. Because we need to play in the sand and also in the water.”  Ok, maybe they decided to have water activities at the last minute, so they announced the day before to supersede the note saying to wear school uniform. (Hah! I’m so gullible right?)

Rockstar walking over from the “wrong” side of the beach

Rockstar’s unable to contain his excitement the moment he sees the sand through one of the side paths leading to the beach from the road, so instead of waiting to enter via the carpark (and collect “passport” at entrance where school staff have set up various educational activities – we belatedly realize), we get out on the road with massive jam still in front of us and enter the beach from a little side lane.

(I must really be the most gullible parent around, everyone else that I can see has suited their kids up in full school uniform. Rockstar must’ve wanted to play in the water, one of the other mums chuckles later when I explain the scuba diving penguins.)

Setting up “camp”…
Which was quite near the parachute station (And in the distance, there are beading activities and stamping/ painting with glitter and all…)

A girlfriend who has a boy with erm, just such swoon-some traits, shows me a beaded bracelet. Her son always goes for a turn at beading stations anywhere, so he can make something for her to wear…. There are just little boys out there like that, I met another mum not too long ago whose lower-primary-aged boy described how he calls her Heart, “because (she is) always in my heart.” Told ya, swoon-some. Me, I can just forget it – the Kings is not like that, and neither is the Rockstar. Just in case it wasn’t blindingly obvious, both have pointed this out. “I’m not like that, Mum.” “But you know I’m not like that right, dear?”

Kings, who tries to take a few hours off work when he’s in town to “be there” for some of Rockstar’s more “important” stuff (as in, “important” to the Rockstar haha) notes there are quite a few other dads who have done the same. There are way not as many helpers-only accompanied kids considering this is crazy-work-schedule Hong Kong and it’s a working Friday morning. I think quite a few people took time off for this.

Kings also notes at least 2 dads have somehow dropped their kids in the water. In another hour however, Rockstar’s squealing delightedly at landing butt first in a wave while filling his sprinkling can. It remains debatable that wasn’t deliberate.

Building sandcastles (they even get lotsa little flags to stick in the sand!)

I overhear a teacher explaining how to make the turrets by adding water and pressing the sand down so it sticks together… And now regret I didn’t endeavor to get a shot of the class flags/ “camps” and little turrets (free flow of flags!) sticking out all over the beach (it was quite nicely cleared up at leaving time, in case you were wondering)..

Rockstar even consented to having his face painted for the first time ever!

No mean feat ok, he actually let school staff draw on his face… And they were even nice enough to match his face to his shorts when I have been bamboozled by my offspring into dressing him in penguins… No sweating the small stuff… And usually Rockstar’s a fusspot about having anything on, the first time I bought a set of face paints at home he just looked in the mirror and bawled at me…

So there are whole clusters of sand castles with flags in them, but over on this side it’s… Ant mounds? Pyramids?

Just before a bunch of little kids started hopping around the mounds
No mush, no bracelets; THIS is what Rockstar’s like – Digging up the beach
Rrare pic where no one else is facing the camera – and surprisingly no one fell over Rockstar still engrossed in digging the hole

The hole digging is actually really cute because every few minutes one of em will holler “Bo-o-ob the builder,” and then the whole group of them will pipe up, “Can we fix it? Yes we can!” occasionally accompanied by marching in place. Obviously all the doting parents like yours truly were melting. Rockstar’s still singing 2 days later.

We would’ve been pretty happy just for the chance to let Rockstar dig a few holes with his whole class/ school around. Except this thing turned out to be a whole bunch of educational activities and bonding. Yes, not to sound smarmy, “bonding.”

Truth is, it’s coming in on the much-anticipated Primary School Interview Season. You can’t really escape from inflicting a school “interview” on your 4-5 yr old in Hong Kong if they’re going to Pri school soon, but Rockstar’s Kindy does what they can and then some, to try and make it as pleasant and un-stressful for our kids. How?

Most of us got our letters of invitation for our kids to go for interviews at the ESF primary schools specific to our catchment area so for the last week our ESF Kindy has been abuzz with Who’s Going For Which Interview Slot since it would be less stressful if our kids saw familiar faces (ie of some of their school friends) at said interview time.

At least some of the parents are looking to set up specific playdates with kids allocated the same interview time slots (not too difficult since the ESF family – yes I really do feel that way with all the help we get – will endeavor to put kids from the same Kindy class who are applying to the same Pri school in their catchment area together in the group interview). So no prizes guessing what the hot topic of discussion is among parents this day. However I also note a few parent conversations that include appreciation for how supportive Kindergarten staff have been in trying to allay parents’ interview jitters.

And what better way for the kids and parents to get to know each other picnicking on the beach; for K1s they’re still relatively new to the Kindy and it’s a great chance to make friends and get used to the other faces at school (I remember this time last year worrying if Rockstar was making friends), for K2s it can be the most enjoyable/ least stressful way for kids in the same interview slots to get to know each other better – what better way than bonding over digging massive holes in the beach – this has got to be the best “organized playdate” ever.

Belatedly I realize just how behind we are on collecting “stamps” from the many activities available – except Rockstar is still busy Bob The Builder-ing so I leave it.

Working at the Enormous Turnip (had to crop the “turnip” out tho, lots other kids’ faces that I didn’t get permission to put up 🙂 And I have no idea whose hairy arm that is in the frame either.

Though they did work on pulling out the “Enormous Turnip” (vaguely remember Rockstar mentioning the book in school, but I can’t remember if it was Quiet Reading Time, or they read the book together, or he brought it back from the school library…)

No surprises here – Rockstar KOed after a hurried pizza lunch. 2 hours later he wakes, does a whole lotta doodling (we missed the sand drawing), painting, then announces I shall read him “just one” book – before KO-ing again. He wakes all chirpy and singing throughout the apartment for the next couple days. 

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Rockstarism #174 – Great Shades of Yellow Submarine

Posted on November 25, 2011 by admin

Move over Joseph (and the technicolor dreamcoat)…

Rockstar: Mum. I had a dream last night. I was driving my car and when I got out there were many cameras.

Me: Taking pictures?

Rockstar: Yeah. So then a bunch of camels came and ate them. 

He does that when awake too…

Think you know what this is? Scroll...........

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Rockstar: Walking plant trying to get away from the fruits because it was shaking the tree and a fruit fell down and nearly hit it. 

And this is a boy who came running, running to catch the fruit and so the walking plant (which is a flower) said thank you. But the boy was already eating the fruit. And the boy has a special hairstyle.

 

Then he added tree ornaments...

Rockstar: Ok now this is a Christmas tree. It’s very cool.

Yellow Submarine was written allegedly while the Beatles were high. Hence their vivid imagination. I am of course joking, because as Responsible Parents Kings and I keep the Good Stuff out of Rockstars reach. 

Ps: In case it wasn’t blindingly obvious I wasn’t serious, for the record may I say that to date Kings, Rockstar and I have never been high on anything stronger than coffee or Whiskey (from Kings’ drinking days). No illegal substances except sugar. (What?? It should be illegal, what.)

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Old Bike Shop Guy In Wan Chai

Posted on November 23, 2011 by admin

Yeah, for real finally, we got to replacing Rockstar’s blue battered BMX… So we venture back to the original bike store we happened to walk into by fluke first time round, and it’s the only one open and bustling late morning last Sunday in Wan Chai.

Rockstar and Bikes

There’s a blonde Caucasian family already deep in decision-making when we reach, and at least two local families stop by to try out bikes while we’re waiting to be served. It’s quite cute, the little local kids will unobtrusively try out the bikes while chattering in Cantonese, then their dads put them nicely back and say “Ok, have breakfast then come back again,” and they carry on down the street. Then another old uncle in the street smiles when notice him – turns out he’s helping Bike Shop Guy mind the rest of the store while his friend is busily taking apart bicycles for customers on the pavement.

Last time we came, we hadn’t realized this is one of the Muslim areas in HK…

Rockstar initially picks a bike bearing some Shanghai company stamp that has lots of Phoenixes on it because it’s the only red one in his size and now that he is “in red group in school” (whatever that means), the color rocks. As in, “I’m in red group now. So it’s quite a nice color” <serious convincing nodding>. This time last year, he would have nothing to do with the color, because “Red group (last year was) full of girls” <yucked-out face>. Dinner could not be served on red plates.

Attempted arty-farty shot of bike shop card – it’s along Wood Road

This card is up here because we felt a bit sorry for Bike Shop Guy who turns out to give real good service (to us, anyway). Very local Canto-speaking old timer whom we hadn’t realized spoke any English until now as we watched him serving the Caucasian family (whose only voice we hear is the mum’s, though there are 2 boys and the dad there too). He speaks shaky but functional English, and is surprisingly polite and patient, for such a “local shop old guy” (<sheepish> from previous encounters I kinda expect them to be grouchy or impatient or loud or all of the above by default) – to the point Kings remarks, “(Blonde mum’s) really rude. I’m surprised he is so nice to them.”

Throughout the time it takes us to park (right in front – hurray for quiet Sundays haha), run around the corner for a bun (well Kings ran, I sat in the car, Rockstar goggled the bikes) because just after early service we’re hungry, Rockstar making a beeline for Phoenix Bike, then deciding on Black BMX when he realizes flashing red tail lights look better on it, we watch the blonde mum have this old guy take out numerous bikes to compare the width of the handlebars, then take apart the bikes to switch the handlebars around for them to try again, then roll out other bikes….. after which she then walks off down the street to see if any other bike shops are open.

To be honest, we did that too, early on (Phoenix bike!! Horrors!! I’m gonna be Mum With Kid On Phoenix Bike in our neighborhood <cringe>. I mean it’s a nice bird, but can’t they do like, fake swooshes or something?)

But then… we kinda figured Ok, let’s just try and buy something – the black BMX – from him. It’s a Sunday morning, most other shops are closed, we’ve been talking about replacing the bike for ages, and here’s this old guy with everything but the kitchen sink excavated out onto the pavement of his shop and still being ordered.

No, this does not make us good people:

It wasn’t blonde mum’s many requests that raised our hackles – not even the lack of any “please” or “thank you” that we could make out – though interestingly the declaration “If we are spending <emphasis> five thousand dollars, I want to make sure we’re spending right,” is impossible not to hear wherever you were standing in the shop – it was her tone throughout, when she was asking him to do umpteen things. You can ask for a lot of things, you can expect service – nicely. 

(We were quietly going “Erm, so obviously you think “<emphasis> five thousand” is a lot of money then…..” Y-eah sorry – I’m snarky because I have no respect for people who do that. I always think it’s the ones that lack substance that feel the most need to show off (which of course makes me judgmental and imperfect myself – Hi, have we met?)

But while I’m married to Neanderthal Man <grunt, snort> Indiscriminate Buyer of Laptops And iPads, Insensitive While Absorbed In Berry, Weirdly Passionate About Ridding World Of Doghairballs – it’s never I Am Spending Money. Look At Me, Kow Tow, Worm. One of the things I love most about Kings is regardless how much he spends, he expects the same level of service.

Anyway. No idea if there’s much in the shop that really costs that much (from the pic does it look like a pro-biking shop where they carry state of the art stuff?) I don’t like cycling. I don’t know bikes. They have handlebars. They have wheels. Who cares. Us class-less bike buyers. What I would care about is the helmet/ any other safety equipment. That’s the price you set on your head (sorry, unfortunate pun). Rockstar’s helmet is from Bumps to Babes, we don’t buy pirated in kucing kurap store. He gets serious and faster on that thing when he’s older, I’ll go looking in the pro bike stores – for the helmet, anyway. And maybe the brakes.

Rockstar’s BMX (which we expect to last a year+; he trashes bikes with all the falling down but how else is he going to learn) was HKD 1,000. We added some battery operated lights for HKD 300. Done. That’s your early birthday present, Rockstar, because we don’t want that thing in the apartment under the tree.

Round a corner... And this is not the pic Rockstar wanted, he wanted me to use one he took with a squished dead cockroach in it. Oh the joys, of raising a boy.

With blonde mum round the corner looking for other shops, bike shop guy deftly fixes all the extra lights watched avidly by Rockstar, then advises us against removing the training wheels altogether, instead pulling them up maybe 1-2 inches higher so they’re still there when Rockstar needs em. Then he hands Kings his card, “I’m always here if you need any adjustments. Or, call me.”

As we leave, blonde mum returns, and resumes asking for adjustments on their bike… Absolutely no idea if they bought anything. Almost want to ask Kings if we can swing by next weekend to ask Bike Shop Guy, then we can all take bets.

Ps: Blonde mum got my attention because living here you usually expect China customers or the very local shops to be rude if you only speak in English and they have problems understanding you. When I first got here, I got told off in a little Causeway Bay boutique when I asked if a pair of jeans was on sale in my dodgy Canton + mostly English and they mistook that for haggling, “This is not China ok.” (They were sorry for the misunderstanding after Kings explained).

Shopping in the high end stores in Beijing on the other hand, my girlfriend recently remarked to me the service in HK is way better. Salespeople in the stores in Beijing are just There’s the goods. Take it or leave it. And it’s not high street they’re selling, it’s Chanel, LV, Dior…

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