Night And Day

Posted on October 23, 2012 by admin
View of Ms Rockstar’s crib and mobile, under Rockstar’s loft

Handling day AND night shift on my own was a new milestone. On good nights, I actually found myself enjoying lying in the dark, Ms Rockstar’s crib next to my little Ikea sofa bed, The Mens snoring in the other room. At least on nights when she isn’t gabbling at full volume to herself, or crying in her sleep through the night. (But once or twice a night is common). On really bad nights, thankfully not very often, Ms Rockstar and I are adversaries, the one determined to sleep, the other determined not to.

Ms Rockstar is not as hard to handle as her brother was at night – IF she is in her room. Move her, even if it’s to our room, and she is worse than the original. My whole vision of a couple hours just her and me at the nearby cafe is a pile of smoldering ruins. She won’t sleep more than a half hour, and then when she is over tired it is ALL YOUR FAULT for bringing her out when she would rather nap contentedly, gabble to herself or chew her fingers in her room.

Did you ask me first Mummy, whether I enjoy cafes?

There is a Man Making Grinding Noises On A Machine Just Because It Annoys Me.

Ms Rockstar is not impressed
(You know, like Mc Kayla)

If she wakes mid-nap you can walk in, hit a button on her mobile, and she will gabble her way back to sleep – in HER ROOM.

If you want an early night, you can just feed her and put her down wide awake – in HER ROOM.

After a night feed if you realize she needs to change her diaper you can take her out to your favorite diaper changing place (yes, I have one, and this is a problem because…?) and fumble about with the light switches……

Ms Rockstar:

And Then There Was Light!

No, Not Really.

Light! No?

Yes!

What is Mummy doing???

Me: Going batshit crazy trying not to wake you and hitting all the wrong light switches. They should come with flashing neon signs.

From Shel Silverstein's The Missing Piece Meets The Big O

Ms Rockstar: Move over, Madonna, traveling with your own pillows is so Last Generation’s Rockstar. I shall be traveling on planes, trains and automobiles with my own room, thank you very much. Or my staff (a.k.a. parents) can just never leave the housing development for a coffee.

Oh, and if they try I shall win the issues debate by screaming my lungs out in transit so all the other passengers shall hate my parents for begetting me and themselves for not walking. Or swimming. We must all do our part for the environment, after all. Rockstars For Fewer Emissions should be on a onesie, preferably in a not-too-sweet pink.

Me: <To The Mens> Roll out the Secret Weapon.

(That would be Kings with his strange robotic Rhythm That Always Makes Babies Sleep.)

Involuntary Sleep

And it’s a KO! 

Secret Weapon however says it takes soooo long and he can’t do anything else and she still doesn’t stay asleep more than a half hour. Which, sadly, is true.

Posted in Babycare Bootcamp, Traveling With Rockstar | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Final Flashback: Mummy @Large Skydive – A Rockstars Chronicle Spinoff

Posted on October 21, 2012 by admin
I picked skydiving in the first place because:
1) Back then I’d felt desperately in need of some “me” time. I would come home from a long work day and dump things in a bowl to eat while spending as much time as I could with Rockstar before bedtime (and even after – I would be with him while he slept til it was time for me to go to bed) – he slept quite late for a toddler and made it up with long naps in the day… After he slept and before he woke the next day I would express milk.
When Rockstar went into what I call his “octopus phase” – getting his hands in everything – I would literally come home exhausted and starving, and then he would want to examine my dinner bowl (though fortunately he didn’t try to eat any of it) and dig his hands into my dinner, exploring the textures. (I’d let him do it because I felt bad having already been away the whole day.)
I realize it’s a little funny that for “me” time I chose to jump out a plane, not go to a spa.
2) I thought jumping out of a plane required the least (a.k.a. no) preparation/ training in advance. Just gravity. Briefly considered bungee jumping but had heard the jerk of the elastic is worse on your back than say, that of a parachute. Also, I was more afraid of hitting something, bouncing about on the string.
So Sky dive Lake Wanaka:

We slept like 2 babies the night before…
(I’ve never been a good sleeper, but somehow the night before the jump was one of my best sleeps on the trip. Kings on the other hand, who can usually sleep anywhere and any time, told me he spent a sleepless night googling accident rates in general and the company in particular. He really is not one for doing this stuff.)
The morale providers (matching outfits a must) grab brunch before their services are required
(Note Kings’ worried face throughout; he however didn’t say anything til after I’d made the jump, after a couple initial questions that determined I badly wanted to do it and realizing if he said anything I’d pull out immediately – this is why I will never do it again.)
Me and my instructor (whom I met 10 mins before) about to board
Yup, it was claustrophobic in there
Getting strapped to my instructor (they only do tandem jumps)
View from the plane just before the jump
Sitting at the open plane door with feet dangling into space
(He’s pulling my head back on his shoulder for the jump)
And off we go!
(These pics are taken by another skydiver who jumps with us, with cameras attached to his helmet)
“… … …”
Is it too late to turn back?
There goes our ride
Which way is up?
In case you’re wondering, I found it very disorienting rather than scary – if you were falling from a plane for real it occurred to me you would probably not know what hit you in your last moments, because of the powerful rush of air, the cold wind and the general confusion. Another girl who was jumping with her boyfriend (she wanted to back out just before we got in the plane, her bf said “we paid all that money we are going through with it!” however told me later she was crying before and during the jump though, so maybe it’s just me. What bothered me the most was actually the cramped plane and worrying I would throw up under the parachute from motion sickness (I didn’t, but just barely – some of the people working there also said they throw up every single time they are coming down after the parachute has deployed btw, and recommended seasick pills)
Tiny chute to slow us down and take a few pics
So tha-at’s what 15,000ft looks like up close
Note: Flapping your arms does not seem to make you fly
I’m thinking I want to kill the briefing lady right now. Free fall does NOT feel like you’re floating – it feels like your face is being blown off. Also, I initially have no idea what my limbs are doing.
Ok, found my hands. Final photo op…
(I don’t know what I’m doing here)
Ok gotta go
HOW does he navigate like that, in virtual free fall?!
(You have to remember to keep your hands and fingers away from the ropes… Not as bad a jerk as I thought it would be though, when the parachute opens)
(This view is when the other diver with the camera attached to his helmet shoots down ahead of us because he hasn’t deployed his main parachute)
Guy With Camera On Head lands, then takes footage of us approaching…
Back at base, The Morale Providers are on a break (aka my supportive hub is entertaining the Rockstar while they wait for me to land)
Rockstar finds other entertainment (yes, I wasn’t the only mummy jumping)
Was determined to land on my feet and not fall over – Yippee, made it!
First thing I said when we landed was “It’s FREEZING up there!”
I Am Mummy, Hear Me Roar. Completed Jump Shot (gotta admire his enthusiasm – he says he does about 10 a day)
“Honey, I’m ho-oome…”
But Rockstar has moved on to more interesting things like shape sorting
(Blurry cellphone pic from my old Nokia that was about to pack it in)
“Adrenaline is Legal” – proudly wearing my dropshop hoodie
The End.
ps: Rockstar is just under 2 years old, in these pics
Posted in Rockstar Shots, Traveling With Rockstar | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

That Which Master Crusoe Named His Man…

Posted on October 19, 2012 by admin

1) “We are currently preparing students for jobs that don’t yet exist… using technologies that haven’t been invented… in order to solve problems we don’t even know are problems yet.”

I thought the Youtube was brilliant. I first saw a version of it at one of the International Baccalaureate Primary Years Programme (PYP) information sessions for parents at Rockstar’s school… (I don’t explain it very well because all education stuff in general feels very new to me, one major reason I’m thankful for info sessions. And the video. Oh yeah Rockstar’s recent school tour was a first learning unit as well…)

I did however take home how we are to support our kids’ learning by asking specific questions (“What did you learn about plants?” i/o “What did you learn today?”), possibly at some point in future coming in as guest speakers with any interesting skills to show our kids, and that the school tries to also give them opportunities to learn what they are interested in… In addition a run through on how to navigate the Virtual Learning Environment, including any interesting items our children may want to upload, powerpoint slides or etc…

Considering a lot of what I remember of my (then) schooling was traditional homework, a lot of memorizing, and later on essay writing in 3-hour examinations, my “d-uh response” is Ok, So This Is Not. (I said “d-uh,” right? I always thought “d-uh” is easier than pretending not to be. And I know how that also makes me….. LAZY :D:D:D)

But seriously, after going through Ye Olde Route myself I really hoped for something different for The Rockstars; application of what has been learnt in different, at times unexpected circumstances…

2) When animals do it it’s always funnier. Halloween costumes for animals. (Or, sometimes why animals bite humans.)

Dis is a ferret dressed as Freddy Krueger

Nightmare Ferret is there because I didn’t want to follow item one directly with the one right below…

3) Artist Damien Hirst kills 9,000 butterflies. Self explanatory.

4) Mind-blowing landscape photography. Also self explanatory. And mind-blowing.

5) Damn you all to hell – typed on a 1934 Corona Silent Typewriter – by Tom Hanks. What I want to know is why he collects them.

6) I actually do sanitize my credit cards. But well, not money. (And who knew drinking fountain and vending machine buttons are some of your 8 germiest office places?)

Ok, last pic…

Chihuahua as Hugh Hefner for Halloween

Apparently I thought mass murdering ferrets were better than playdogs. Maybe not. It’s still wrong. HOW do we explain these to our kids, Hugh Is A Guy Who Likes Rabbits? <self-righteous sniff>

Also, “Hugh’s” actually a Pomeranian.

Good weekend…

Ps: Muppy update: Each day, my parents have been driving over to spend the day at the vet’s, tending to their mostly still-unconscious dog… At lunchtime, my dad would drive out and buy lunch back, which they would eat in the quiet, deserted clinic… For half a day yesterday, they thought she had taken a turn for the worse, because she was sleeping like the dead, unable to wake even when they brought the other dog in. And then my dad opened his bag of Mc Donald’s Chicken Nuggets and she wanted one.

She staggered 6 joyous steps. She could detect motion, with her limited vision. Just when I thought I could cut down the number of long distance text messages I was sending for updates, my parents were called back into the clinic last night. Muppy had had two more seizures and so my parents spent most of last night in the clinic, before returning home to get some sleep in the morning, the dog still under heavy sedation. 

Maybe I should be even more worried than I am. Certainly my parents, especially my mum, must be. I haven’t told her, I will some time in the future, that it occurred to me the dog may not even have survived 7 years if not for her loving care.

Oh, she’s up again, at press time.

Posted in Rockstar Thoughts, School For Rockstar, The TGIF Posts | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

This One’s For The Dog Lovers

Posted on October 17, 2012 by admin

My parents left abruptly one day, significantly cutting short their visit. Coming home after drinks following an Asia Bankers Club – Georg Jensen mini-event, Kings and I were greeted by grim expressions. The vet had called just a little earlier – one of their dogs had suffered a seizure and they weren’t sure if she would make it through the night.

Not my parents' mutt, random mutt in Sai Kung that looks quite like her...

Angeline isn’t even that old, maybe 7, but she has been obese most of her life. (Though only the vet seems to notice.) She also inherits the name my mother reserved for any other daughters she might have. But I’ll go with Muppy, short for her nick “Mutt Puppy” which she also answers too, because I think it’s cooler. My parents bring Muppy and the other (super fit and healthy older) dog on 5 am walks in Gurney Drive, and she eats significantly less than JD does, yet is some 7-10kg heavier, though they have similar frames. If there was an Owners Of Overweight Animals And Don’t Call My Dog Fat support group in Penang, my mum could chair.

Right there in the doorway, we book my parents back on the next available flight. At the time Muppy had been unable to walk 4 days, and this was her second seizure (the first was apparently very mild and she got over it quickly) – the vet hadn’t thought it dire enough circumstances to call til they thought she might die. He didn’t know exactly what was wrong with her either. That night, my mother was praying she arrived before the dog was gone.

The next day at 6am I come out for a pre-sanitized bag (to store expressed breast milk) and my mum is standing in the living room fully dressed and ready to go. The flight is at 3pm. I hoped the dog stabilized before they boarded the 4+ hour flight because my mum is 66 and I worry about her stress levels, though a googled and printed-out article Kings finds mentions seizures are rarely life-threatening. But scary nonetheless.

My parents made it back. Except the vet wouldn’t let them come straight from the airport because after my mum spoke to the dog over the phone from Hong Kong (by all means enjoy yourselves), Muppy got so agitated hearing her voice that they had to double the sedative (which obviously isn’t good for the dog). Thinking back, the vet must’ve barricaded his ICU and threatened to shoot my parents with animal tranquilizer told them it could be worse for Muppy – my mum has never forgotten one of her dogs died of kidney failure on the operating table several years ago without her getting to say goodbye.

The next day my parents camp out in the vet’s clinic for the rest of the day while my mum syringes porridge into the dog. (We are all pretty good at force feeding animals medications and stuff, at some point I also learned to breed hamsters for a science project, but that’s another story. My mum is much better at cleaning up after a dog that has incontinence, though. Another old mutt of hers tottered about that way in the last stages of her spoiled, bark-at-the-bottom-of-the-stairs-even-if-it’s-the-tiniest-of-drizzles-because-someone-will-come-sleep-on-the-sofa-with-me life. In fact this trip I bought the nicest dog potty training pants I could find for her dogs in black, to use as a diaper cover after she saw JD wearing a pink baby diaper one day and thought it was brilliant, except for the pink. She would rather mop the entire home with Dettol, half-bathe her dogs if they have any accidents, blow dry, and – wait for it – apply olive oil so their fur doesn’t dry out, apparently it’s better than fur conditioners, than have her dog be caught in a pink baby diaper.)

This story was to say Wow My Mum Is Obsessed With Loves Her Dogs.

We don’t know the final outcome with Muppy yet, last report from my dad is she appears blind and still can’t walk. It’s early days but in case you were wondering, we have agreed to euthanize upon vet recommendations before. My mother has also nursed old, crippled dogs who were otherwise healthy and in no other discomfort for several years, before they passed peacefully. Her ability to handle night feeds and the worst of Rockstar dramas comes from her long-standing dog dramas. I swing between worrying she is getting too old to lug sick, crippled dogs around and thinking her rather extreme acts of kindness somehow raise her strength and resilience.

We’ve said goodbye to several animals in the past, not that it gets easier though. You keep it together and go on loving, for the ones still around. For the ones still to be around in future. For ones you can still do something for. 

One night, leaving one of the first dealing rooms I worked in, having stayed back as usual to go over transactions and read research papers (got gym membership for the shower facilities nearby), I got on the train and opened the little card from my mother (used to sift through my mail while commuting). Getting off at the next stop, I walked back to Raffles Place and sat on some steps in the Boat Quay area, and mourned the loss of my first dog. (Not counting Smokey, the huge mutt I used to ride “horseback” on while I was still in diapers). Vicky had been with me since I was 14.

And then this creep who had too much to drink sat down next to me and tried to strike up a conversation and I got all Alien Queen on him but that’s another story.

Ps: Watching President Obama fight back live on CNBC right now.

Pps: Hang Seng is up almost 0.9%! 😀

Posted in aileensml, Rockstar Thoughts | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Pandora, Le Sophie…. The Girls Went Shopping!

Posted on October 15, 2012 by admin

Kings complains a lot about Ms Rockstar’s “bedhead,” so I’ve been looking for hairbands and hats… (These are from best dressed kids…)

White bobbles beret…

Instead of:

pic from here

Great for smoothing down the “crazy hair” babies often get…. Except…

Why don’t babies come with two heads,  for when you can’t decide on headgear?

Harry Belafonte’s Coconut Woman comes to mind…

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Not liking Rockstar’s old hat…

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Oh, oh, this my favorite. Guess who:

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Hint:

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(Pic originally from here)

What, Boey Pai Say? But you smiled, right?

Ok fun’s over. Here’s the rest of the Cheese Sandwich Post (Today I Ate A Cheese Sandwich For Lunch a.k.a. Nobody Cares Post) about my love of Pandora charms (don’t scoff ok, I have readers who email me about their own Pandoras) and Ms Rockstar’s love of aged French giraffe chew toys (um, for that hard day in the office?)…

Old Bracelet:

Oops my child is in the way wondering what I’m doing in the cab.

OK old bracelet:

Since Kings and Rockstar originally picked out a few charms on a starter bracelet, the 2 hearts wearing crowns are there whether they match anything or not, for obvious reasons. And yes you can guess exactly why I have a couple star beads. One rockstar each. There’s one for JD too – the flowers with very light blue centers near one end of the bracelet – same shade as her one blue eye.

The gold leaves with diamonds charm I bought couple CNYs ago, when we visited my parents’ home in Penang. CNYs used to be very stressful for me growing up, we always had to be right on time to go visiting, stuff like that. It was with trepidation after many such memories that I went back – to what surprised me as the best CNY I had ever had in Penang. So when we got back to HK I wanted to have that memory with me.

The first thing that strikes you entering my parents’ home is the giant leaves from various creeper and other plants in huge pots my mum has lovingly tended, around the entrance:

Anyway. Then I wanted to add glass beads in a not-too-pink color in honor of Ms Rockstar. Except I don’t imagine they’ll match the turquoise polka-dotted bead then-3yr-old Rockstar picked out.

Me: Look at my bracelet. D’you remember which beads you and Daddy picked out? (It’s been a really, really long time – I couldn’t wear the bracelet all through my pregnancy, and even when I did wear it I can’t remember Rockstar ever noticing. Not to mention he picked it out in like, 10 minutes flat, before “crashing” whereby Kings brought him to nap in a cafe nearby while I carried on shopping).

Rockstar: <looking dutifully> Sure. I picked this (turquoise polka-dot) one to represent the snow (starter bracelet was purchased somewhere in a San Francisco mall at Christmas, after a trip to Lake Tahoe – Rockstar really loves snow), Daddy picked this (teal enamel celtic bead next to polka dot) one after we laughed so much at him eating that fortune cookie with the fortune still inside. It’s supposed to look like a fortune cookie.

Me: <Thinking: crap. There goes my chance to change anything. And how come he remembers when it was more than 2 years ago – that’s half his lifetime> You actually remember all that?

Rockstar: Yeah. Why?

Me: I wanted to get some pink beads for the baby. But I’m having a hard time matching the blue ones.

Rockstar: You can take mine out, Mum <shrugs>.

Me: Really? You don’t mind?

Rockstar: Really. Just take it out. <turns back to whatever he was messing with during dinner>

I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Now that turquoise polka-dot bead also reminds me of this conversation. (When I point that out to Rockstar, he looks pleased. Before going back to being absorbed with whatever it was he was gravely attending to before I interrupted.)

So new bracelet (yes photo bombed by Mustela diaper cream):

Actually not too bad after all, right?

But whether it matches doesn’t really matter after all. This is why sometimes you see mums wearing fugly jewelry. And I’d rather have this than say a tennis bracelet (by the time you’re done with gold/ gemstone charms your Pandora’ll probably cost about there – cos you feel the pain less, adding precious charms over the years, instead of dropping it all in one go for the tennis bracelet and it is addictive <sheepish>)

On an aside though, I wanted to point out the silver heart with blue spinel next to Ms Rockstar’s not-too-pink bead. The manager at the Pandora flagship in Central was impressed. That bead was on sale in the UK to commemorate Kate and Wills’ wedding. It was given to me by Mum of Cherub. She left HK in the end 🙁

Rockstar wearing chartreuse Lord Of The Flies illustration-esqe Piggy tee

(I mention because she then sent an amazingly thoughtful baby gift package and looong handwritten note after some planning re timing with the hub – it was brought to me in the hospital freshly mailed from her newly movied-into home in the States and I still don’t know how she did that – think dragon-ended baby eating utensils, an arty farty piggy tee for Rockstar, a onesie with “Sayang” written in pink, a very Malaysian-looking stuffed toy tapir (WHERE did she get these, I always wonder), and a HUGE lifesaver of a book about the aerodynamics of flying paper planes and lots of folding instructions, among others. Rockstar was launching paper planes about the room for days, while we were busy with the unexpectedly early new arrival.)

“C & W,” Catherine and William. My mum’s a huge Royals fan, from Princess Diana days.

Then I also discovered this bead that’s supposed to fit your Pandora bracelet, from personalized boutique:

As in, you can have a bead made with your kid(s)’/ dog’s/ cat’s/ hamster’s name. I haven’t ordered these before, but I’ve bought name necklaces from the site over the years, I agree with other reviewers their service and execution of personalization requests is great. Besides, who can resist their CEO:

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Ms Rockstar’s turn to do a review. She picked……

Sophie the French Giraffe from Mothercare. Was wondering what all the fuss about this giraffe was (the Mothercare lady enthusiastically goes “yes, and they are back in stock!” when I ask), and what was up with the slightly creepy eyes, until I read that its design hasn’t changed since 1961 and how they make it is a closely guarded secret.

Way to go Marketing.

Ms Rockstar agrees.

  

Le Sophie, le mademoiselle Rockstar. Nom, nom, nom. Love Sophie, you yummy animal.

(But seriously, I have teething rings, teething jewelry, various interesting-looking (to me) baby chews, the baby still loves the giraffe best.)

Too bad about the squeaking though. JD keeps stalking it. One day you see a pic of it in JD’s basket, you’ll know I have to get Ms Rockstar another one. Except how’m I going to tell the dog’s and the baby’s apart? <shudder>

Posted in Rockstar Shopping, Rockstar Shots | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Rockstar Brings Us On A Tour Of His School

Posted on October 14, 2012 by admin

The Year Ones in Rockstar’s school conduct a tour for their parents all by themselves as part of their learning journey to illustrate their confidence and independence, finding their way about their new school. Recently, it was Rockstar’s turn to show us around…

Raring to go – That’s him showing us into his classroom.

Then hauling his bag out after unpacking standard issue lunch bag, water bottle, library book bag… There’s a no hat no play policy too, probably really effective making them remember to bring their sunhats!

 

Stowing it into his locker…

And showing where they stow the school readers (reading “homework” books changed about 3 times a week, not to be confused with library books) each day…

 

Rockstar waiting for us at the bottom of the stairs, to show us around… Periodically we’re passed by lotsa “Upper Class Men” (a.k.a older kids) busily on their way, who don’t give us a second glance…

JD’s human friends (yes I know this is a weird sentence – we call ’em that because walking the dog we occasionally meet these ex-teachers from Aussie IS who are in serious need of a dog fix and will play fetch with JD for more than an hour while I sit and vegetate) have told me you have a bit more idea what the school is really like when you listen to the background noise as you wander about… I recall the decibel level in some of my mum’s community schools (high school some more, not primary) was deafening. My mum’s been retired a decade, I think her hearing still ain’t that great 😀

Anyway what we hear, passing kids along the stairs and such in Rockstar’s new school, is the busy stomping of half-grown feet as they troop up and down stairs on their way to where they have to be. A couple “Hi’s!” to each other but no rowdiness…

 

“Does it count if we find the door, or do we have to find the actual person?”

We uh, settled for the doors/rooms, cos we figured Rockstar was supposed to show us where he should be at PE and what-not, didn’t think kids were supposed to go hunting down staff members everywhere…

 

The anti-sharksfin sign caught my eye, it’s done by a Year 4 child, I think I read on the board…

 

Guess where we’re going (btw I think the Putonghua department must’ve been quite meticulous labeling things in Chinese)…

 

Yes the library! Rockstar probably spent the most time here, we were the last to leave…

  

It’s a pretty big library, and the kids are explaining to their parents which labelled books they are allowed to take out, Rockstar discovered a Mr Men stash (not the original series mind you, the additional stories including limited edition ones for charity, written by Adam Hargreaves, son of Roger Hargreaves the original Mr Men and Little Miss creator…)

“The people who write the ABCs are called authors and the people who draw the pictures are illustrators. Even I couldn’t even answer that question, <Classmate> told me that….”

(“Even I.” My son already thinks he knows everything!)

And it overlooks the Hong Kong University’s Stanley Ho Sports Complex (which yes our kids get to enjoy, including the swimming pool – yay)…

This blur is my son dancing around (quietly!) in the computer lab. He has mentioned coming to play the online Math and English games several times, and shows us which pc he usually sits at… I was little worried because my MacBook Air uses a touch pad but he says the mouse is fine…

Rockstar’s classmate slips into the seat next to his and deftly hits Ctrl+Alt+Delete, unlocking the screen. Something else Rockstar definitely didn’t pick up from using my MacBook… We exchange grins as her dad calls up her user ID and password stored on his iPhone. (And then I recall reading that the PE department is on Twitter!! Boy, things have changed since we went to school…)

Rockstar hearts “secret garden” hopscotch…

And then back to class, where the kids show their parents their school work, writing, orientation diagrams with cut and paste pictures… The decibel level is…. significantly contributed to by excited parents 😀

And a final favorite water color.

The end.

Posted in School For Rockstar | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Another Friday Bites The Dust…

Posted on October 12, 2012 by admin

1) “Optional Course:

Customer sleeps in girl’s arm (3 min) – 1,000 yen
Girl pats customer on the back (3 min) – 1,000 yen
Customer pets girl on the head (3 min) – 1,000 yen
Customer and girl stare at each other (1 min) – 1,000 yen
Girl changes clothes (1 time) – 1,000 yen
Girl gives customer foot massage (3 min) – 1,000 yen
Customer gives girl foot massage (3 min) – 2,000 yen
Customer sleeps with head on girl’s lap (3 min) – 1,000 yen
Girl sleeps with head on customer’s lap (3 min) – 2,000 yen”

Did you cringe? Ha gotcha! The above is part of the menu at Japan’s first Cuddle Cafe where, for a fee, someone will sleep with you. As in, literally: The website doesn’t specify what customers are and are not permitted to do during the standard course, but it’s probably safe to assume your options are limited to “close your eyes and be quiet.”

Mums everywhere must either be thinking Wow, I’m Getting My Co-sleep For Free! Or… I Should Be Charging My Toddler !

And, in case you hated your other job, they’re recruiting. Love the job description:

  ■ Job: Sleeping
■ Location: Akihabara (3 min walk from station)
■ Qualifications: High school age to 30s
■ Compensation: 3,500 yen/hour
■ Hours: Weekdays 15:00-22:00, Weekend/holidays 12:00-22:00

2) Lioness befriends baby impala (AAAWWWwwwwww). After killing it’s mother (Uh… “Sorry I had to eat Mummy but we can still be friends”?)

Fine, here’s a picture

3) I used to be One Of Those People Who Had Never Seen An Elephant With A Prosthesis. Not anymore.

4) A chihuahua, a cat, a macaque… These animals really are with the police. May the force be with them.

If only HK Police uniform was that cute…

5) “In every cartoon we’ve ever seen of Pepe Le Pew, he’s chasing a female and not taking “no” for an answer. In today’s world, we call that stalking, and this would likely result in a restraining order.”

And other beloved fictional (mostly cartoon) characters who’d have a rough time in today’s real world. Me, I cannot imagine a time when Little Rascals could ever be considered cute…

6) I like (if that’s the right word) this article that starts off with a family feeding their 18 month old a KFC burger in India and then finding live worms in it for if I ever have fast food cravings. But I really liked the one in the slide show at bottom of article, about the “unidentified animal toe” found in a bowl of spinach and artichoke dip. Because I don’t remember spinach or artichoke having toes. Recommended for losing baby weight.

7) Contrast that with 11 best service stories ever. Yeah I linked this yesterday, but it’s here because I love the one where a 3 year-old writes to a Sainsbury’s in the UK asking “Why is your Tiger Bread called Tiger Bread, it should be called Giraffe Bread,” and someone actually responds and renames it Giraffe Bread.

Mums everywhere must be swooning.

8) In honor of it almost being Halloween (Rockstar has a costume! <gloat, gloat>) here’s some DIY Halloween costume ideas (Ms Rockstar’s monster costume arrived wayyy too big <ungloat> The monster head gear fits 4.5 yr old Original Rockstar, not a 6mth baby.)

Way To Rub In My Kids Are Tiny…

Anyway mini explorer I thought was nice n easy:

Or else golfers, basketballers, track and fielders, Thai boxers – way to express your favorite sport too.

9) Something else to do? How bout Spot The Owl. Thank you, Bored Panda.

10) And this one, intended to demonstrate science can be fun.

Good weekend, knowing if you get a tiger, it’ll use a litterbox.

Posted in The TGIF Posts | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

20-Seconds-Of-My-Life-I’m-Not-Getting-Back Conversations That Morph Into Judgmental Opinions

Posted on October 11, 2012 by admin

Sometimes it really can take only 20 seconds to form a lasting and fairly accurate impression… (SOMETIMES, I said.)

Never forgave our insurance agent for “I’m so worried I might pass this Bad Throat Infection Requiring Second Consultation And Bout Of Antibiotics to my (3yr old) son, he had 38.5 fever and we were sooo freaked n rushed to doc. 38.5. THANK GOODNESS doc said it was nothing! Would you like to see more video clips of my son?” at tail end of our last meeting without ever warning me or making any attempt to not make me sick when Ms Rockstar was barely 2mths old and I’m nursing.

So it took very little for me to hate him even more, when I get this phone call…

Agent: <brightly> I have some news! You need to redo some tests cos they said it’s been too long since your last test (which was just before I got pregnant – they rejected me last time because my last PAP smear was two years ago. My Gynea then discouraged doing the PAP smear while I was newly pregnant (well d-uh) and said they were welcome to all my previous medical records but that wasn’t satisfactory for them.)

Agent: (Carrying on, still cheerfully) The good news is, it’s ONLY <list of tests>

Me: But that’s ALL the tests (except the PAP smear. Also, Ms Rockstar is now 4 months old, the last bunch of tests can’t have lapsed by more than a month or two I think..)

Agent: Uh, yeah.

Me: You sat on it a further TWO MONTHS AFTER we furnished you the updated PAP smear, saying there was really not going to be another problem! And now I have to redo EVERYTHING EXCEPT THE PAP SMEAR?? I could’ve just started a new application somewhere else easily without all that time wasted!! Now I have to go through all the tests (i.e. fast) AGAIN??? While I’m nursing??

Agent: Oh, you don’t have to pay for it.

Well excuse me, did you think I view a battery of blood, urine and cardio tests for which I have to fast for in the middle of nursing and caring for a young baby as a fun ride in an amusement park??

So I ended up fasting. In between pumping and trying to burn the absolute least calories taking care of the baby. I-Who-Have-Never-Dieted-In-My-Life canNOT fast. Don’t even care about the loss of baby weight, I cannot do without food. Especially in the middle of the day (because when I pump after a night of not pumping it’s for an hour to produce 10 ounces in one go, on average, and I’m ravenous first thing in the morning. Ms Rockstar has a full morning of Fist Making And Other Fun Achievements with me after, too.)

Since I’m already on about how I hate our insurance agent, here are some other gems:

Agent: (filling form) So. No job?

Me: Uh, no. I quit to raise my son when he was about 2.5 –

Agent: Well, any plans to return?

Me: Umm, it was a very uncomfortable pregnancy and my daughter is barely 2 months (when conversation took place).

Agent kinda snorts each time at my responses re not working, which maybe I’m sensitive about as I’ve had some snark before from local receptionists, cleaning ladies etc about not working (apparently it is their business), making me feel a wee bit guilty for leaving my job. Though much worse for leaving Rockstar. (Why do we even allow ourselves to be made to feel guilty by people we don’t even like, I want to know.)

Me: So…. your wife’s at work now I guess, what does she do?

Agent: No, no (gesticulates and shakes head). She is stay-at-home-mum (to their ~3yr old son). CanNOT leave in care of helper, obviously our expectations and requirements for raising a child cannot be met by a helper.

(I’m thinking, Is It My Cantonese, Or Did He Not Even See The Irony In That, Given How He Just Snorted At My Job Situation? It’s like when an American girlfriend describes one of the very local doormen telling her husband “Wow, you’re getting FAT,” or when one of the local mums asks me, “Why does your son still look like a toddler?” ie it’s not really considered rude I guess…)

Me: Would you think about having another child?

Agent: Not during summer (Recall Ms Rockstar was born at the height of summer btw). It takes planning, many Hong Kong people plan for their children to be born around September. Perfect timing for school applications. Also, it is very taxing on the mum because of the weather…

I can hear you asking why the hell we’re still with this guy. I don’t want to be. He was Kings’ regular guy for the rest of the stuff he apparently never screwed up with Kings. I charge that it’s possible my husband was too busy to notice. If my insurance application hits some dumb ole snag again like timing on tests (btw at some point weeks after his fever freakout he also met me while I was sending Rockstar to Putonghua to sign something else, hence I’m suspicious of the delay as being him sitting on it, rather than something he absolutely couldn’t help) I want my mummy friend’s agent.

Honestly though, with me it’s personal. I’m biased because of Fever Freak Out Incident. Because it tells me he is one of those a-hole parents who thinks only their own child matters. And he happens to be handling our family, our children’s insurance. The policy crap is annoying. Only. But it’s the It’s All About MY Child Only attitude that really pisses me off. I have two of em, one pretty young and at times struggling with naps because of heavy construction works next door, I can still find it in me to inquire after the health and wellbeing of your son, you can’t even pretend you’re interested in mine. I know you know I have kids, we bought their insurance policies from you.

Proper “parent-to-parent etiquette,” according to yours truly <uppity sniff>, is when you have the grace to show some consideration for the other parent’s child because uh, the other parent’s child is probably as important to them as yours is to you. It’s just basic courtesy. So I don’t like It’s All About My Child Only Parents.

See, just like that, a 20-second judgmental opinion. Think I’m wrong? I’m now so biased I can’t even tell an objective opinion unless it walks up and introduces itself.

Hi, I’m Objective.

Hi, Stupid Joke.

Agent: (repeated couple times) Wow, your son is much better behaved than mine!

As in, he’s surprised?

Ok Aileen. Stop Talking. Nothing this guy says is going to sound good to you. Walk away. And don’t look back either, you might turn into a pillar of vitriol and bitchiness.

Don’t know how God stays in love with us, we as a people are awful.

Yeah sorry, wrote most of that waiting in doctor’s clinic on very low blood sugar, before my letter to Ms Rockstar below, but only just finished this one.

Ok must end with something nice. Felt much better after reading 11 best customer service stories ever. Some of these are amazing, they help you see beauty.

And random happy picture:

Stingray Photobombs Tourists (from Reddit, made Huffpost news as biggest animal photo bomb ever). Somehow they don’t seem very happy. But that ray is gorgeous, look at that smile.

Posted in Rockstar Thoughts | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Dear Ms Rockstar, A First Letter

Posted on October 9, 2012 by admin

Dear Ms Rockstar,

This is probably the first real letter I’m writing to Future You, at a time when you are 4 months and 1 week old and have just screamed the pediatrician’s office down, staring your sense of betrayal up in our hypocritical faces, to dare to bring you to this horrible, horrible place of motor skill checks and needles and tell you It’s Alright It’s Alright. You were already voicing displeasure long before they gave you your shots because you were hungry (90 minutes of strictly not eating, having not fed very well since you woke for reasons known only to yourself) and rather tired (having not managed to drift off for your long nap til just 20 minutes before it was time to leave for the clinic.)

Well anyway. Looking into the face of the most beautiful baby girl in her world, Mummy has so many dreams of what she will tell you, things she wants to teach you. Foremost among them is to not grow up spoilt. Jaded. Failing to see the beauty in all the things He has created.

You will need these in life, because a sense of entitlement will kill you. Maybe not literally, but it will kill the you you could aspire to be. (Just as the inability to use any and all circumstance to become a better version of yourself will be a waste of a bad situation.)

If/when you find a life partner someday, Mummy will tell you that forever and ever is not easy. (Mummy blames Hollywood.) You cannot fathom how not easy, until you go down that route. You will think at the start of the road that Sure, You’re Prepared. Love Overcomes. But that was just stuff people made up to sell books and albums. The problem is when gifted script and song writers are mistaken for life coaches. They’re just super marketers and salesmen. The reality is it takes effort to stay in love. And there will be times when you’d rather not be. Every marriage has its crisis points. It’s bullshit when people say they don’t have them.

More than initial compatibility, Mummy feels, is the determination to make it work, to stick to your vows. It takes effort to stay in love. That’s the bit people don’t warn you enough.

And no, if you get married Mummy’s not gonna tell you to walk all over your other half  because he is someone else’s child too. He is someone else’s Most Beautiful Baby Boy, just as you are Mummy’s Most Beautiful Baby Girl, always. And the only way to make a marriage, a family, some semblance of an existence among extended family co-existing harmoniously instead of say everyone dreading Chinese New Year or Christmas and Thanksgiving, will be to recognize the fact: That’s someone else’s child/ parent/ dog/ cat. Mummy wants you to enjoy Chinese New Year in a way she always wished she could. If she had her way, the biggest family tradition, at whichever time in the year that might be, would be one of love and kindness – is that not the spirit, and be not the spirit far more important, than the letter of the law. Empty traditions, when people stick to the letter and not the spirit Mummy finds, are an oxymoron. But well at least there’s still Christmas.

Somewhere in there are repercussions for not being kind. For not doing unto others as you would have them do unto you. Not because He is a vengeful God, He’s not. But because He is a parent, and you have to learn to grow up, to live, to love. Or get sent to your room. Have your sleepover privileges revoked, weekly spending allowance restricted. You know, how parents can discipline you…

The hardest lesson Mummy will have her work cut out teaching you and your brother is how to be happy whatever your circumstances. Because Mummy doesn’t know all the ways (though certainly having a faith in God helps) and she’s still trying, though she knows it’s where she wants to be ultimately. Not because life is beautiful, but because life sucks. We’re just trying to mess about surrounded by assholes every day until the day we croak. But we won’t survive said assholes unless we can see life as beautiful. Mummy’s not giving you any righteous bullshit here – seeing the good, the beauty, will raise your resilience like no other. It will allow you to take the rubbish while you’re drawing back your little fist to give the idiot annoying you the punch on the nose he so rightly deserves. (No, not really serious bout that)

Being unable to see beauty will sentence you to an inability to find happiness, “no matter how hard you try.” It is its own kind of hell, the inability to be happy.

Your brother, insisting on sitting on Daddy's knee while he is carrying you so Mummy can walk the dog

Your brother told me sometime ago that he will find it hardest to share Daddy with you. (Mummy of course is no problem, your brother can mostly take or leave Mummy. In his words, “Of course I love Daddy more, he’s the guy.” <roll eyes>) Mummy is told this is unusual, your brother’s very strong preference for Daddy from very young –  apparently it’s more common in families to have Mummy’s Boys and Daddy’s Girls. Your brother is very much a Daddy’s Boy whom it would seem has yet to completely forgive Mummy for once having been a girl. So Mummy guesses you’ll be stuck with her.

Daddy and Daddy's Boy sharing the papers while you were attached to Mummy in the harness

Mummy however sees our family dynamic as a blessing. Your father has no idea how to raise you in this world. (But dungeons are always a good idea). He already often finds it hard to say no to your brother, who gets away with not eating eggs for breakfast for kicks. Even Mummy is not completely sure how to raise a little girl in this new world, she’s frankly terrified, though she has some ideas from having herself been a little girl who grew up bullied initially and (mostly) eventually did not take crap from assholes. (Mummy says “mostly” because she has a naturally long fuse even though she is outspoken).

At least Mummy is determined you will neither grow up spoilt nor Tiger Parented. The latter for obvious reasons, but the former because Life and Forever And Ever Til Death Do You Part Someday are tough. Spoiling you or making you unprepared in any other way will just make it tougher. Mummy wants you to be happy in life and marriage, if you so choose someday. You will not be happy if you expect things to always go your way, nor will you make your spouse, someone else’s child, happy. And if your spouse doesn’t meet you halfway in making you happy, in supporting you as you support him faithfully as his wife…. well don’t rely on your brother and father, get up to speed about kicking his butt all on your own, please.

Because you are after all Mummy’s little baby girl and she loves you. She’ll teach you to kick butt too, if it ever comes to it.

Love,

Mummy.

Posted in Dear Rockstar, Talking To Rockstar | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Behold, She The Ms Rockstar

Posted on October 8, 2012 by admin

Ms Rockstar: Goin’ out?

Me: Yes, darling. Daddy has an Investing In Art talk tonight, which is why Mummy is half dressed while rocking you to sleep for the night. She just needs to throw on her Max blazer and Gucci and Kenneth Jay Lane necklaces and hop a cab once you are obediently asleep.

Ms Rockstar: Oh, how little you know.

So I’m literally rocking the baby and watching the clock-with-swinging-pendulum-I’ve-moved-into-nursery-because-Ms-Rockstar-likes-to-go-to-sleep-staring-at-it up until the last possible minute. Maybe it’s my makeup or different clothes she can smell.

Ms Rockstar: <accusingly> You’re Going For A Party! You Want Me To Sleep Just So You Can Go Out And Drink Wine!!

Me: Well d-uh.

Ms Rockstar: N-ot so much. <proceeds to mess around until Absolute Last Second when I really have to be out the door and reluctantly leave her kicking around on her bed under my mum’s supervision>
(Actually she often goes to bed willingly at night, fairly often we put her down awake even, but there are times you can kinda tell she’s gonna make trouble if you try to put her down..)

At 56kg, I still can't wear any of my pants - only tights. Hence the Dagmar merino wool leggings. And my old gold snakeskin Prada strappy sandals are still really tight...

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Ms Rockstar: (to Conquering Hero Rockstar arriving back from school) So you bladed up to our doorstep carrying your artwork/ freebie from friend’s mum/ library book?

That's nice.

Ms Rockstar: That’s nice. I can make fists!

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Ms Rockstar: People offer me supplications of all the Things That Make Interesting Noises in the land…

Ms Rockstar: And yet…. I shall keep on practicing my Standing With Maniacal Fist Waving.

Good week ahead… <waving fists>

 

Posted in Babycare Bootcamp, Rockstarisms | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments