Rockstarism #108 & #109

#108:

Rockstar: Can I have another chocolate?

Me: No, darling, you had ice cream earlier, that’s enough chocolate for the day

15 mins later:

Rockstar: Can I have more fish?

Me (thinking oh no, who knew he was on such a binge today, are we under-feeding him?):

Sorry darling, remember you finished all your fish and extra helpings? (I told him earlier he’d completely cleaned us out of fish). Do you want some cheese instead?

Rockstar (grinning): No, some chocolate

#109:

Me (to Rockstar, about to KO on the sofa): Come put on your pyjamas, before you fall asleep and then get mad at mummy for waking you to change

Rockstar: No.

Me: Why no?

Rockstar: Because I said so.

Me: Oh for goodness’ sake if mummy said that to you you’d be totally mad about it not being a good enough reason.

Rockstar: Then because – because – because I get really angry sometimes when I say No! No! No! and you still take pictures of me on your phone! <fake huffiness>

Me: What’s that got to do with pyjamas?

Rockstar: <Silence>

Me: What’s –

Rockstar: <very huffily> SSHHHHH!!! I. Want. To. Sleep. Pray for monsters.

Me (getting his pyjamas on very casually): Dear Father, please protect us from monsters –

Rockstar: And Flamingos.

Me: What?

Rockstar: FLA-mingos. The birds.

Me: Why?

Rockstar: Because they’re BIG birds that peck.

Note: I corrected him on “peck” – he initially said “bite”