Rockstarism #244 – How To Stop A Baby Crying (And Something About Soup)

#244

Earlier…

Me: Hurry up and finish your Lego while I go get you some soup.

Rockstar: Yay! Soup! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYY! Wait. What kind of soup?

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So we were at Cafe Habitu in Elements Mall, Kowloon tonight, it was surprisingly easy to get a choice seat overlooking the rink and the first time we saw what looks like a succession of primary school-aged kids’ ice hockey matches.

Cold weather sport. Big stick. Rockstar was just totally taken in for a bit.

The cheering and applause was thunderous for goals scored even though there weren’t THAT many people watching… but what I really wanna know is why no one was shrieking KILL! KIIIIIILLLLLLLLL!! 😀

And the other two –

For some reason Ms Rockstar has attracted some attention from passersby each time we’ve crossed the tunnel to this mall. Seeing the pretty pink CNY decorations I insist on turning the iPhone on us and taking this pic:

And another mum who’s there with hub and girl toddler in stroller approach us and offer to take a pic for us instead of me contorting about with the iPhone, “because I’ve got one too, I know…”

And then of course Ms Rockstar does what she always does when she’s in a car, and I’m cursing and swearing at the annoying webus wifi window that pops up every time we’re near one of the large public buses, when I’m frantically trying to open up Papa Pinguin on Youtube “#%$%#$&#&^ I don’t want webus!!!!” “NGGGGGEEEEAAHHHHHHHH” – and suddenly Rockstar throws his head back and laughs.

This makes Kings and I laugh too, which makes Ms Rockstar double her efforts at blistering our ears because – and I’m almost sure of this – she thinks we are mocking her.

And then at some point –

Rockstar: Mum. I just remembered how to stop a baby crying. I googled it one night.

Me: You googled it.

Rockstar: Well, I searched Youtube. I typed “How to stop a baby crying.”

Me: <dubiously, over the fire and brimstone that is going on right next to me> Ok, how?

Rockstar: <like he’s announcing something really important – well, it is> You get a dog. The kind that goes “AwoooOOOoo…” And then you put this dog next to the baby. When the baby cries, the dog goes “AwoooOOOoo…” and it works. 

We arrive home shortly after, and are caught up with making nice to the four-legged family member who was left at home and has hidden herself behind the sofa because we gave her a large salmon-skin chew and she loved it so much she dug our onions and potatoes out from the bottom shelves in our kitchen trying to find more, and then settling the two kids to bed. After that I’m curious, and so I search Youtube and find what must have been the video Rockstar found:

This gotta be the video Rockstar was talking about. I need to ask him what he thinks we should then do about the dog we’ve got right now. JD would be livid – it was bad enough we brought home another Little Human That Makes That Noise…

ps: No, JD didn’t hurt any onions or potatoes

ps: Probably time to think about a child-safety lock on our internet… Though to be fair Mr Super-serious has a fairly healthy (ok, anal) attitude to inappropriate shows – he can sit next to Kings watching some violent thing on tv and contentedly play with his own toys or watch Youtubes because he “doesn’t want to see anything that might give me nightmares.”  

However obviously you have to tell him something bad is coming up and obviously Kings is going to not always be able to do that so I don’t let him sit there for too long…